A letter from Mar 20, 2025

Dear FutureMe, I hope you're doing well. I hope everyone has not changed and all the issues you are facing right now including your biggest fears will be fixed & not happen respectively. I hope ur GPA has only continuously increased since now. I'm not sure if you remember but today has just been the first week of me moving into my new apartment. I lowkey am excited to know where you're living at now but i trust u will be able to find a good place. I'm really scared about the future right now because of it's uncertainties and because I know I do not dare to step out of my comfort zone to change my lifestyle. I really hope you know to change this time. I feel like i've let my past self down way too many times already. Whenever it's about saying something to the future me, it's always hoping that I'm finally skinny and will love my body as it is. But it never seems to work out. I have too much things to catch up rn due to me moving and settling sally's stuff etc. I don't know if I can catch up but I really do not want to let myself down. Not anymore. I want to finally love me for me, and do so without prejudice. I'm scared, i'm very scared. I don't want to grow up. You're almost going to be 21. Do you know I still sit and space out and imagine i'm still in the past, at mama's house playing hide and seek/swimming/snatching TV with ah gong? I realised i'm starting to forget him abit, and i'm really scared. I read somewhere that a person's dna(?) will stay on your body for 7 years, and you are left with less than a year before he disappears again. Why is god doing this to us. I hope your stutter and weird self is gone, I really just wanna speak properly and fluently like my thoughts.