A letter from Mar 10, 2025

Dear FutureMe, maybe 2025 or feelibg that i got today at this moment is not only about gaining accomplishment but also to know myself bette,get rid of any negaives like negative habits,negative qualities like screen time,getting more social and be helping,maybe it wants me to try that out as well,maybe its about trying out new things like learning something new,maybe its about speaking less and listening more,maybe its about letting things flow as they happen or as god wants them to be and not try to change it or think what is happening and all nonsense thoughts or anything else,maybe its about knowing you are 25 years old now and breathing slow and thinking now you should not just ghink about yourself but now more people will come in life,maybe its not about building new connections but about strengthning the old ones and thinking which why and how the new personal connection should be made without having any negative thought in mind.maybe its not about fearing,constantly wailing,disproving myself in the mirror but maybe its about staying calm,accepting my flaws or strengths and understand that my flaws can be somebodies strengths but also somebodies flaws are my strengths too.maybe i will cry when i will read this,i know i will read this on days when i will need them the most and i will find such mails automatically without finding them,maybe its not about constantly sitting infront of screen and thinking and or fearing about future past but about present,maybe its not about staying away 3 4 am till night just thinking how i will do it or what is going to happen but maybe its about sleeping at 10 o clock but using all time as i can and sleeping with content when i sleep,maybe its not about competing with others or thinking why me but maybe its me getting better day by day.i hope i will write myself such emails daily maybe i will see and be in places i see in thoughrs or dreams rather than only thinking.i dont know what i m writing thinking typing i just am typing thinking writing,maybe its about my wish or dream to put some meaningful video on youtube that i always wanted too but never knew of what how to show it on youtube so that someone can actually see or understand it and say they feel the same or this video helped them understand some concept they had be struggling with or something,maybe its not only being with people you know but also about staying with unknown people and understanding them,make new friends and not just say oh i dont trust easily or need a lot of time to match up or catch up with people before actually start freely talking sharing thought or something,i dont know what i am saying,why do we help some people but feel like not helping someone even if they behave with us the same see the same act the same think the same why do we see someone as competition and others dont why dont we ever see or think that other people dont or will not even matter in next 5 or 10 years i wont even remember the instance or people or even the reason i was scared or competitive or regretful or angry or disdained or i dont know what emotion,i dont know if i will regret due to such emotions now in next years or not of get angry on myself cry about this made my future bad or something like this or what not i dont knwo what will happen i this feels uncertain i dont even understand sometimes i think what i have now is good and i want it to stay same sometimes i think i want things to improve also but also get ahead in life etc i dont know what i am talking thinkinh typing.i think these is my current state of thinking,where i am now where i think i am going with current thought process i dont know what will happen i dont know i fear a lot i worry or get angry or sit idle or think or get happy but i know their are my two friends who i can always ask or tell no matter in what situation i am,hmm i dont know the type of response i may get but yeah it anyway does not matter only the situation should get solved and i must improve as a human better than i was the previous day. Thanks, thanking myself p.s.dont worry.days are cloudy i love cloudy days,days are rainy i love rain,days are cold and dark i will write such emails to me then and dance with my imaginary girlfriend on song sia snowman in my dreams hahahah,if days are of summer i will go with my friends and play sports or maybe again try to bingewatch entire netflix series not just romcom but also of history maybe i will not just obsess on world war history or of great kings and rulers and empires but also try to understand why the ones that failed failed,i will not only watch muhammad ali videos or conor mcgregor or khabibs videos or indian sportmen videos i adore or cat videos, or i will try something new maybe i will start posting meaningful content or any content on youtube that people will watch maybe i will also put my random videos of maybe home work travelling talking with friends playing any sport on youtube just like american people that i have always loved to watch like how simple exiting their life is they just randomly film their life and post it on youtube without fearing or worrting of what people may think of them or anything random. thanks