A letter from Mar 05, 2025

Hi Son, I am writing you this message, as I always try, to help you. Whether it is to help you understand, help you figure out, help you be happiest, help you through troubles, and/or to help you get the most enjoyment out of life, that is my responsibility, and my sincere joy 8-) Life. Life changes. Life can be confusing. Life can be really fun. How am I supposed to live? Have you thought about these things? May I 1st suggest you consider this motto to live by?: I’d rather be an optimist and wrong than a pessimist and right. Living by this phase will help you very much to have a positive attitude through troubles, which you WILL have, and will in turn helps\ you live better & happier. I wonder very much if you will remember it and live by it. Now as you are newly 14 years old, you don’t have a generally rebellious attitude, yet you often don’t appear to be curious or want to listen or be better by way of working at things. In a way, I WANT you to be rebellious, because that would show thee is some real curiosity in you about living in this world. I love you dearly, my boy, and in no way am I trying to shame you or make you feel bad. I want to help build you up. You may not yet know that at times you need to be challenged, and yes, even to lose, in order to be better and stronger for coming challenges. I send this a year ahead wondering what changes you will have in this year. I question if your work ethic is as good as it should be, and I believe because of many of your actions to date in life that it is tending to be poor, because I see you sucked into watching (and not doing anything on or with the data you see on) the different screens in your life. I believe it best for you when you search, seek and are curious and adventurous in a good and upward building kind of way. Yet I don’t see you often bearing down to pursue an interest, or to seek out new knowledge, as I hope you would do. I am troubled by this for multiple reasons, but mainly because I want you to be able to get through difficulties in life, not because I want you to BE any certain way, except successful. I believe your screen watching is not increasing your learning or intelligence, as it is mere amusement, and I have stated this to you several/hundreds of times. In short, screens appear to be dumbing you down. So far, you have not proven me wrong in your lack of curiosity or probing questions of things you don’t know about. You SHOULD ask questions. You SHOULD search for learning. I hope you wake up to that and I hope you learn how to learn. This is what keeps a person in modern times from becoming illiterate, if you learn how you can best learn things. The modern-day illiterate person isn’t something who doesn't know how to read & write, like in previous centuries. The modern illiterate person doesn’t learn how to learn, and cannot progress and/or achieve better things in life. I challenge you at timesr . You don’t like it, as a child would be expected to react, but it’s done because I love you, and am seeking to push you towards growing and learning, not because I have any oppressive, narcissistic or domineering goals. Now God is good, and He loves you even more than I love you. And He knows that we don’t “get better” or act more like He wants us to act, through more & more accusations (the law). He knows that we change for the better through curiosity and kindness. When you mess up, does your self-voice in your head sound like accusation or like inquiry? Does it sound cruel, or does it sound kind? Figure that out and immediately call and come find me to tell me. Whether you’re at school, in a movie theater or dropping a dump, call me when you figure this out, or come and tell me in person immediately! I really want to know what you’ve figured out about that. 8-) At 14 years old you have clearly not yet reached the level of maturity, communication and life experiences as you should be by now in order to be successful in the direction of life in society. Does this make your eyes furrow? Good, because it means you care, and that is a good start. Roberta, who has had 30 years teaching plus a college degree training to be able to identify child behavioral problems and help improve them, and has a long record of success in helping children learn and grow in a positive ways, and she also feels that you are behind schedule, or not as mature as you should be. I say this, again, NOT to hurt you, but to make you wise to the fact that you have some significant growing to do to catch up to what would be average or normal understandings and behavior for someone your age. I hope this makes sense to you. I hope you can see this as realistic and not condemning. I hope you know what all of my words mean and are intending to do together. I want to help you. I always want to be there t help you, and yet there are times you must be on your on to grow best. You need to be better at communicating with Roberta & me, because we may seem harsh to you in asking you to do other things than lie around the house watching TV, but our job is to prepare you for the battles of life that are ahead. I believe your when you are not here at home with Roberta & me, you are not getting much help in the way of helping you grow to a successful adulthood, and since you have unlimited screen time on TVs and multiple video systems there, and you stay there currently 10 out of every 14 days, this is why you haven’t learned some of the harder lessons in life, which can be painful but you will see later if life, were good for you. You spend more time being with your birth mother, and therefore should learn more than you do from me, but that does not appear to be the case. I want to help you but I don’t have much time in which to do so, and you seem these days to be angry with me for trying to help you grow. Life ain’t fair, and it ain’t easy. I want you to be prepared for when you are living on your own, to not be used or taken advantage of by others. I hope you can see the wisdom in all of this. Please communicate more with me. I hope you understand the helping tone of this entire message. My goal is to lift you up, not beat you down. I love you, Son. Love in Christ, ~Daddy