Yourself, but from before and the stupid one.

Dear FutureMe, yeah it's a long time ago now. I don't really have questions but, yeah no.. Are you in touch with Rayden? do you even remember him..? Some days I'm crying about him, hardly. I don't know how to continue to live without him. He was my friend soulmate, how to live without it? Anabelle just celebrated her 11th birthday, I'm feeling like an alien around her now. She said because of me, she's not going to invite a lot of people at her 12th birthday. I ****** up. I know it's my ******* fault, I feel really guilty, as I should I guess.. I almost cried at her birthday, while everyone was chatting with her, I was writing about Rayden, ******* Alien. Do you still do foster? I wanna continue but with Ginger and Sabie going bye bye, I'm heartbroken, like a cycle, new, happy, sad, forgotten, new, happy, you get the point. Why can't I be normal? I'm either alone, or only with Violetta, she's my only friend at school now! Others are too weird for me, and Madyson is always absent. It's a miracle when she isn't! this night, I read all of dad notes he wrote for me for like 3 years, how come he doesn't anymore? I feel like a teenager, but I'm 11! yeah I know, I'm more mature than the "average" but I only and ONLY feel childish. Is your- our life better now? I hope. It was you from exactly 1 year ago, well to be exact at 22h33 ciao!