A letter from Jan 21, 2025

Hello 26, I'm trying to figure out why I keep doing this. Do I know my own goals? I remember watching a video on Youtube when I had just started college that talked about the confusion we feel in our 20's. I remember feeling so grateful that I couldn't relate to the message. As I've continued into this life though I think I'm starting to get it. I wouldn't say I'm sad but most days I don't feel happy. I'm such a cliche. Anyway, I got engaged, moved to a new state, have a fantastic job, own my dream car, my community loves me so much they gave me an award for it. Yet, somehow, I can't quite guarantee that it's me who I'm living for. It feels like someone is yelling and I don't know what that means but I suspect they won't stop for a very long time. Oh how our problems evolve, 25