A letter from Jan 17, 2025

Dear FutureMe, You are literally in your thirties, why have you allowed whatever hormonal fluke that hit you like a truck when you looked in his eyes take over your capacity for reason like this? Right now, you are convinced on a mental, spiritual and physical level that swimming boy is the one. This is on the basis of two meetings. Because when you first made eye contact you felt an instant connection. This is almost definitely not reciprocated. You are an idiot. Obviously. Unfortunately, you are also an idiot who is scheduled to see him potentially 3 times over the next two weeks (all at group events of course because, say it with me, HE IS JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU). Hopefully you are looking back on this like wtf was going on in my mind why did I delete hinge in favor of in person interactions? Like CLEARLY it was a mistake. You have gone TOTALLY hysterical for NO reason. Guys don't feel like this. This level of crazy will only be reciprocated by the criminally unhinged. Guys don't descend to stalking strangers linkedin to try to find out peoples age and whether they are related or dating. That's mental, psycho behavior. Lets face it, you don't want to be acting that way either, I know, but the pull of that knowledge, the stupid little facts you scrabble for, in the hope they will offer a tiny glimmer of hope that he is at least a teeny weeny tiny bit attracted to you, is also pulling you deeper into a pit of self-doubt that is gonna take a hell of a lot more than eye contact and a compliment to pull you out of. But, as I am sure you now know, in 2026, he almost definitely 100% is NOT INTO YOU. He doesn't even watch your instagram stories (you can cling to that one reaction all you want you loser, It means **** all)! You are also like 65% sure you sent him a rose on hinge and he rejected you like ffs to continue to entertain this infatuation is a level of cringe you are so much better than. If the experience of writing this, a year ago now, wasn't enough to kick you into gear about 1: risking rejection, make your intentions clear so you can avoid descending into a cycle of doubt, questioning and false hope 2: putting yourself out there more in general and just asking if guys are ******* single instead of STALKING THEIR LINKEDIN AND CROSSCHECKING EVERY GIRL LIKING THEIR PROFILE AND THEN TO NOT EVEN MANAGE TO FIGURE IT OUT YOU ********. ASKING QUESTIONS IS NORMAL!!!! IT IS NOT RUDE AND IT DOES NOT NECESSARILY INDICATE ROMANTIC INTEREST THAT WILL LEAD TO THE STING OF REJECTION. BE NORMAL. ALSO REJECTION IS BETTER THAN THIS YOU MORON ITS CLOSURE. YOU CAN'T ALWAYS RELY ON BEING CHASED BY GUYS YOU TOLERATE RATHER THAN LIKE. That way lies only disappointment. This you know. SORT YOURSELF OUTTTTTTTTT. (if you haven't already lol)