A letter from Oct 03, 2024

Dear Heart of 2026 - I don't really know what to say and im typing this on a random day because i suddenly remember this. Heart as of now I'm 16 and grade 11 senior high. You're probably grade 12 and already graduated or maybe graduating??? But anyways how are you? I want you to know and I've always say this that it's fine to feel your emotion because that's the purpose of it is to feel it not avoid it. I want you to remember that you fought so hard to get in life of where you are now. Life eventually will have more challenges but i know you can do it. Recently things have been so hard for me I can't seem to let go to the past and I constantly think i don't deserve any happiness 🥲 and i know its kinda crazy because I think like this but also I advice to myself to learn to move on and love yourself. I'm still confuse on what to do with my life... I feel like I'm left behind because why are the others so good academically? and im just here existing and doing average. My friend praised me because I seem so sure on what to get in college and what to do with my life but in reality I really don't know... But if you were to ask me ofcourse i really want to do a job that will make me happy that even though im tired, im doing what I love ❤️❤️❤️ I really want to ask how are you mentally and physically? Because im really wondering and i want you to answer honestly please this is just between as 2024 and 2026. As of now, I'm really struggling in both... mentally im really sad and tired and it's like a cycle feeling . Whenever i'm happy i can't seem to enjoy it genuinely because of constantly thinking that something bad may happen later. I'm really with family problem and it's so hard to avoid it and I can't avoid it. I don't feel good around my so called family and it seems falling apart. When I'm in school atleast i can feel distracted by family problems. Family problems really affected me so bad and I want you to finally move on. Idk what's going on the future but please remember YOU GOT YOURSELF ❤️ Don't let anyone take that to you. Physically, I have cough and a sore throat which is sucks but anyways I NEED YO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF more because its really important like your physical is important just as much like your mental. It's so hard to focus when your body is tired. I don't have the best immune rn and im really trying to be better now🥲🥲 so pleaseeee don't forget to take care of yourself and you'll save alot of money. College is near and I'm wondering what you are feeling. Probably nostalgic? I mean i really miss being a child when problem doesn't exist.. but we're already here teenager and studying. I hope you're still friends with your junior high bestfriendss❤️🤞🤞🤞 Whatever you take on college or let's say whatever you do in life I hope it's a step to Success ❤️❤️❤️❤️ I HOPEE WE ALL WIN IN LIFE 😭❤️😭😭❤️😭❤️