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Dear FutureMe,
hi
this is now a letter to next year
which isnt even that far anymore compared to the original 2 and a half
but heres an update anyway
saying that i met a guy is overselling it
i added a guy in valorant
ill be honest i added him bc he sounded american and in the servers i play in thats super rare
it was refreshing to hear someone without the accent i hear so often ive picked it up
i asked and he comfirmed that he was originally from america
and is now in dubai
whatever originally means
now when i add poeple in val im seriously not looking for anything other than someone to play the game with
ofc every single guy has a diffrent idea when they hear that im a girl
i just wanted to know more about this agency he mentioned he had in dubai
fine ill be honest i liked his voice a little
anyway
lets say things have gotten out of hand a little
a little over a week later he is calling me love amongst some other weird *** **** like mamista
like wtf is that my guy lmao
and i thought i was getting ahead of myself when i imagined what would happen if i had my own apartment in kish and maybe he payed a visit
lets say i havent been able to leash my mind at all
there were times my parents would say something to me and i would realize im so far into daydreams
you get the point
the day after i added him we talked in val
we havent even played the game once
which is the opposite of what i was adding him for
let me tell u he is not one to shy away or take things slowly
after we talked in val we didnt talk for three whole days
typical me avoiding things that scare me
anyway on the forth day and the day we were going on vacay i decided enough
that i would take my chances
bc i hadnt been able to stop thinking about it
by it i mean him
but i wasnt about to just text him
cyz that would be too simple eye roll
i was gonna do a whole thing where i posted on insta for the first time in forever
a little cringe im glad i didnt do that i dont really use insta as we know it wouldve been a little tooo obvious i was doing it
for him
ahem ahem
anyway
that same day he texts me
butterflies and stufff
goofy ahh me
and that same day i get a spam email from tarot.com telling me "this person could be ur soulmate"
now im not saying that means anything
but i noticed it and i never notice spam email
;)
im so done with myself at this point
im so over myself lmao
anyway
unlucky me the hotel wifi was ******* than ****
we texted that day but like it felt like sending massages with a pegion
im not gonna try to spell that
it probably would have been faster to send smoke signals
and i wasnt about to text him like that for the whole vacay
so ignored his last massag until i got back home last night
the first thing i did as soon as i had wifi was text him
like a whole paragragh
we talked for the rest of the night
not really at some point i told him i had to leave bc
idk bc
bc we shouldnt over do it
right?
in the middle of it he was showering lmao
took his phone to the shower with him
took picutres!
not anything too wild ik i was terrified about it too
but like he aint shy at all
i might have been gigling during the whole conversation
he said some WILD stuff
i tried to remind him he met me a week ago
anyway
i dont think ive ever blushed that hard
im actually crazy
half the time i was giggling i was secretly crying for myself
cuz like we both know how this is about to go i dont even think i need to say anything
yea
now i told u all this bc
i missed the addmition window
last chance was last night
i wonder what i was doing that i forgot about something so important
i WONDERR what distracted me
mf
ahem
so thats life
im basically screwed no collsage for me
we are done for all thanks to my giggling stupid ***
thx to my naive ****
i cant like i havnt talked to boys before eyerolll
to be fair i havnt in like years
im rusty af and it shows in how fast i grow red
and how much i let him get away with
cuz any person knows its WAYYY too soon for "love"
and "mamista"
i cant get over how he said that
im so stupid
a sane person would bail
thank u everyone for reading i will seek myself out
idk what the fk im doing
signed
saba
ur dumbest friend <3
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