A letter from Sep 13, 2024

Dear 29 year-old me, Hey, how are you doing? It's 28-year-old me. Today? It's my birthday, and it's also your birthday. I just turned 28 and I woke up first to my mom calling me with the classic. Topo-Gigio singing "Las Mañanitas" blaring in my ear, hehe. I instantly woke up smiling, forgetting that just yesterday I was feeling melancholy. I couldn't even do anything. I woke up feeling tired, depressed, I couldn't even make breakfast. And then past me sent me a letter, telling me that I needed to keep looking forward, knowing full well that I would feel this way. Well, now I'm writing to tell you to look up, things always find a way to work out. I don't know how you'll be feeling after a whole year of living in the North Country. I hope you don't feel so sad anymore about leaving your family, friends, and everything you know so that you could form a life with Trev in a new place, with a great opportunity. Yes, I miss San Diego already, but I'm slowly growing fond of this place. I've always wanted to live near so much nature. I love the trees, the lakes. I like seeing the small changes in the weather, how the leaves begin to turn red, the mist that rolls along the mountains. Yes... I always wanted to live close to nature. I had dreams as a kid to have a cottage in the middle of the woods. Where I am... it's kind of close to that, and the fact that I've fulfilled that dream, I can only imagine what else I can fulfill. At the moment the house was just cleaned up, it was of course a mess. Many things had to be thrown away, sold, or given to his mom as they were his grandfather's stuff. At first it felt strange, staying in a house that belonged to his grandfather, and with a lot of antique furniture and personal memorabilia. The fact that we don't have to pay anything is amazing. Except for property taxes, I won't have to pay for much. It was all good fortune and luck that I could live in such a place. But it is different to what I'm used to, good different. I already saw deer in the back woods, there's different birds, different kinds of bugs, I hear crickets constantly and bird calls. I feel like a Disney princess, haha. I hope to enjoy this everyday, I don't want to get used to it, as much as people say I will. I know what they mean when they say it, there's no negative connotation. But for me, getting used to it feels like I would take it for granted. I want to be amazed, feel relaxed, and calm everyday with the nature around me. Well, I hope that very nature inspires you to create. You will do great, don't give up on your dreams. There will always be hardships, but together, you and Trev, together you two can do many things. Focus on your goals, and don't be afraid to slow down every once in a while and go out for a walk through the woods. Call your parents, talk to your sister, your friends, your cousins. Plan a trip to visit them every once in a while. I hope you really enjoy this place and I hope you've gotten far with your game idea, I know you have lots of ideas in that noggin. Keep writing, keep on drawing, make music, stargaze and laugh. Those are the things that I don't do as much anymore, but I still have that passion, even if it's only an ember, fan those flames and keep creating. That is your core, so do not give up. I find myself just lying in bed sometimes, imagining all the things I can create... I could've created even from years ago. And then, I don't do anything. Do not stay inert. Keep moving, keep creating. Well, I hope you get to achieve as much as you want. I am just getting back my energy, with one moment of silence and one cup of matcha at a time. I hope you do well for yourself. Don't be afraid to start, to continue, and to finish, even if you fail, the only thing you can say is that you tried. You already know, not starting feels worse than failure. We've been through it multiple times. Anyway, Happy Birthday. I hope you enjoy many more to come. From me to you, 1 year from now. -Past Me PS: You have better saved up money! You gotta stop spending so much -.-