A letter from Sep 06, 2024

Dear FutureMe, Are we one step closer to our goal? ——————————————————————— I never go anywhere. I am never allowed to hang out. I’m in the US and i can’t even fully enjoy my life here. Football games don’t even exist in honduras. I got the opportunity to be in the us, to go to an american high school. I could go to football games, homecoming, prom, but i’m not allowed. My biggest fear is growing up and hating how i never got to enjoy these things when i could’ve. I have the money and friends just not permission, and I don’t wanna grow up and hate the fact that i could’ve went to so many events if not for my dad. I don’t wanna grow up and realize that i didn’t fully enjoy my teenage years while being in America because of him. I hate the fact that that’s probably how it will be. I’ll grow up with the regret of not going to so many things that don’t even exist in honduras. That’s why i wanna go to college far, far away from here. It’s funny how i was actually thinking that it was okay if i stayed here in maryland for college, but i can’t do that. I’ll be over 18 and still won’t have freedom. Being far away from here will grant me that. It will also grant me a fresh start. So i’ll do my best in all of my classes. I’ll study hard for everything. If i get something wrong i’ll find a way to re do it. I’ll get good grades and i’ll get a good scholarship and i’ll get far away from here. That’s my goal. But first comes the baby steps. I’ll get into more clubs. I’ll do more service hours. I’ll get perfect grades. I’ll study for SAT. I’ll get a perfect score for SAT. -REPEAT- I’ll get a good scholarship. I’ll go to college far away from here. ——————————————————————— In case you forgot, that above is what I wrote on september 6, 2024, at around 7:30-8:00 PM (excerpt for the “-repeat-“ part.). Please tell me you didn’t screw up. I sent you a letter that you received on January 1st, 2025, as a reminder to start a new year with the right steps. Did you get into more clubs? How many service hours do you have now? Did you get perfect grades? Did you study for the SAT? What about the AP exams? What was your score for the SAT, and the exams? Are we closer to getting a good scholarship and going far, far away from here? This letter is very different from the one i sent you on january. The other one was a reminder. I want you to make us proud with the response for this one. I want you to read this and realize that you tried your hardest, and that we are in fact closer to our goal. I don’t want to be too harsh though. Did you go to homecoming? Please tell me you did. But please, please, please, tell me you went to junior prom. Please tell me a regret is not being formed right now. Do you know what you are going to do now? Getting a job should be pretty good. If we want to get far, far away from here we would need money. Try to get more service hours. Start preparing for your last year of high school. Don’t procrastinate. Start getting your essay done (we have a lot of ideas formed already). Start preparing for the last year you’ll see all those people in school. Start preparing to say goodbye to all those teachers who helped you so much. If possible, give a gift date with a little note to those teachers that made school easier. Show them your gratitude. Don’t be embarrassed or anything, either way there’s a great chance you won’t see them again, because sadly, we do have to grow up. Going to college and being far, far away from here means growing up. We don’t want to grow up though. I’m scared of growing up. Are you scared too? I’m scared of forgetting all the people i met. It’s inevitable however. Still scary. I wish I could bottle up all the names and faces of all the people I had the chance to talk to. I can’t however, and they will all just become a person in my following list. Maybe. Can’t do anything about it, so we just have to move on. Good luck on your senior year. Hope you enjoy your last year of high school. Your last year of being a kid. Make it worth it. Appreciate and show your love to those close to you. To those that you hace a great possibility of not seeing again. Enjoy the little moments. And if possible, keep a journal, so that once we’re feeling nostalgic and we miss those whom we spent so much time with, we can remember a bit of the happiness that we felt. You only live once. Don’t waste it and live to regret it. But be careful still with your choices. -From your sixteen-year-old self.