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Dear Zoe,
I watched a video mentioning how the most peaceful people have created enough internal space for all parts of themselves to co-exist. The good and bad. Dignity and shame. Courage and fear.
I am constantly criticizing myself to do better, think smarter, be more efficient, and hold myself accountable at all times in order to achieve my goals. Which in turn can lead to growth, but after hearing that it made me realize that I haven't been giving my present and past self enough grace for mistakes. Every once in awhile I get flashbacks of all the things I've done and let others do to me. I have to forgive myself. At every moment in time I'm doing my very best. I'm human, imperfect.
Whenever I wrote these futureme letters in the past, I had these big aspirational goals that my entire life would change. I'd discover a career I'm passionate about or I would finally be able to afford living in my own apartment. While I still want you to dream and think big, I'm realizing that these things are not the end all be all. To find delight in the everyday, with where you're at now, might be the most important goal of them all. The grass is not always greener.
Let your curiosity lead you. Seek joy and simple pleasures. Stay connected to yourself. Be kind. Love Mom, Gabby, and Alex with your whole heart. Take care of yourself. Have fun. Be present. Try new things. Let yourself be bad. Make mistakes. Learn. Grow. Keep moving forward.
I love you for who you were, who you are, and who you will become.
Rooting for you, always and forever. There is nothing you can't overcome.
Love,
Your younger self
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