A letter from Aug 05, 2024

Isaiah, It is August 5th, 2024. You called off the first day of work today but you are currently faded and feeling good about a song you just finished writing (A Banger). What ever came of that track? Was it the one to propel you into the spotlight? I'm pretty sure it didn't but hopefully you prove the 32 year old version of yourself wrong. You had a great time in Cancun for Damon and Paul's wedding last week and decided to redirect your returning flight to Detroit. You brought in 32 in Toledo, your first birthday in Ohio since 2014. Today you posted the reaction videos of you surprising people and took a moment to recognize how many people love you and were genuinely so happy to see you. It reminded you of how many people would be hurt if you were gone. It hasn't been easy. This summer you played around with the dose of your meds, increasing it slightly and you are feeling good mentally but the lingering thought of suicide has continued almost daily. In May you said that things were up in the air after the wedding. At the time, August seemed like the only month where suicide wouldn't forever ruin things for people (holidays, birthdays, etc) who would remember you. Leaving Detroit to go home to LA, you had the thought that everyone was able to see you one last time...I hope you've made it another year to get this message. I'm sure you have. A few days ago, a horoscope told you that this was a year of living up to you're full potential. Right now, that desire to keep being better and doing more is keeping you going. Music is the one thing that you haven't full explored yet and each year you're getting better and today, you were determined to see what comes of it. Here's to another year and opportunity to keep exploring. You are loved. You are adored. Love yourself as much as you love other people, Isaiah.