A letter from Aug 05, 2024

Dear FutureMe, I want to start this letter off by saying, wow, it finally happened, I finally got into a real relationship. I’m really happy right now, Jonathan just makes me feel actually so loved. It’s a weird kind of love when I don’t really feel performative, I can love him in a relaxed state, I can truly see myself being with him for the rest of our lives. We just went on our fair date yesterday and I really loved it, I had an amazing time, we took the cutest photos and got matching necklaces, and for the first time ever, I got to go out in public with my boyfriend, unafraid and unapologetic. I really hope we’re still together when you’re reading this, I really want to introduce him to the family and just come out already, I haven’t wanted to come out more than I have right now, but at the risk of this not working out, I’ll protect myself and hold off, at least until 1 years together, which would have been last month from the day I’m reading this. I’m a little scared for school not gonna lie, this upcoming semester I have school, work, AND a boyfriend, it’s gonna be a lot to juggle but I think I got it, we’ll just have to see. I’m excited to be closer and closer to graduation tho, I really wanted to become a medical scribe but I don’t know, I just don’t know if I have the drive to even do the job search. I might be in over my head on the whole surgeon thing, I really want to do it but when I see what other people are doing I just feel like I’m not trying enough. You’d think that would be my cue to try harder but nope I guess not. I’ll try harder, I just know it’s gonna be hard. Okay I’m writing a lot right now and I’m trying to read a book with briza so I’ll make it short and sweet. You have this, you will have a beautiful life full of love, hopefully full of Jonathan, and however you turn out, be proud of yourself, I’m proud of my future self just knowing that you survived. Sincerely, Your 20 year old self, lovestricken in the summer before our Junior year of University.