A letter from Jul 26, 2024

Dear FutureMe, Where shall we start? I read your letter from yesterday and you seemed like a different person to who I am today...and probably who you will be like when you read this letter. So, current mood - tearful and I don't know why. I think it's a mixture of frustration with my job, my love life, my house, my drinking, my smoking, my weight, my cricket. Lots of things really. Just writing it down, I can see how busy I am so it's no wonder. Let's break it down. Firstly, work. 1. It's just a job. Yes it's been frustrating and unfair but ultimately, you've fought for everything you wanted and got it. So be proud of yourself. You did that. Going forward, what do you want? Do you want to put it lower or higher on the list of priorities? I think at the moment, let's take the pressure off, do a good job and learn as much as you can. Go out and see those customers. Devise your own little plan as if you worked for a good company. That way, you'll get your work ethic back... we'll talk about your ethics later. 2. Weight - wow you've recently gone below 10 stone for 2 days in a row. All I can say is keep doing what you're doing as it's working. Keep being mindful about your gut health, crack on with Zoe, strength training, fitness training, food choices. Keep going and I wonder how much you've lost when you read this letter! Don't worry if it's not a lot...you can do it and you'll feel amazing 😍 3. On the subject of weight...and health. What the hell are you doing still smoking??? Let alone the amount you've been drinking. Time to get a grip. Listen to Annie Grace, run more, strength exercises, drink water. Lift yourself up. You know you can do it. I'm getting emotional just writing this as this is what I have missed in my life...a voice who's championing me. Finally, I realise, that voice is mine. Little steps and you can do this. 3. Love life! Ha! Really? Don't go there. You are not ready...by a mile. Have you got HIM out of your life yet? I really hope so. It will be difficult because of the loneliness...but it has to be done. This will have an impact on everything... 4. Home - a tip. A mess. Disorganised and dirty. You want the opposite of this don't you. I really hope you've made some headway. Filing, paper, wires, clothes, books, games. Then...you can clean. Then you can decorate... before it's too late. This means, keeping things tidy. Getting up early....shall we try to ultimately aim for 6am. Let's start with getting up at 7.30am every day. It will help in the long run...it means less boozing, less late nights and crucially, more time in the mornings. Let's see how you get on. 5. Cricket - you're 56! Just make an effort, practise, keep turn up, be part of the team and most importantly, ENJOY it. If you don't enjoy it, don't do it! I've noticed that the more you practice, the better you get...take that on board....have you? We'll see 🙈. So all in all, the top two priorities for the next month are your health and your home. They are the two that will make you feel happier. You are great. You are lovely. You can do this. Your happiness is in your own hands. You will feel so much better. Love you and here's a big squidgy hug for you from me...and all those new friends in your gut 😁 Buncha flowers for ya 💐 xxx