A letter from Aug 10, 2023

Dear FutureMe, July 31, 2023 5 am. That morning I found out that my ex was having *** with another woman. The girl dmed me on ig asking me if I was the girl on the ID pic that she sent. She saw my photo on my ex's wallet. She told me everything, they met in June, they had *** for 3 times, she was at his place for a couple of days, they went on a date on our monthsarry. All of those happened while I was breaking down because of my thesis, family problems, and I was also depressed and suicidal. I already had suspicions but I was too occupied to think about it. The girl also sent me proofs, vids, photos, voice recs, **** I didn't know what to do but not a single tear fell from my eye at that time. But instead, I uttered "finally" im free. I only had the courage to write all these because I feel like I am slowly getting over it tho there are times where I would still cry myself to sleep and ask why did he do that and how could he do that to me. I never got to find the answers to my questions as we didn't talk about it. He didn't even say sorry. At first, I wanted to seek for answers but I realized that nothing will change the fact that he already cheated. I'm not mad nor hate him, I still wish him good. People would usually ask how I handled all those, I thought that I was just strong but maybe it was because im already numb from all the pain. I think im doing a great job in my healing journey but sometimes I wonder if he really meant when he said that he would heal my inner child cause turns out he just traumatized the child and adult me. That's what makes me sad sometimes but yeah it is what it is. I hope that I will heal from the trauma that he caused but Im doing good right now. I still love myself and I won't ever let anyone meet the child in me. p.s i finally got the courage to seek out for therapy after years of being depressed. im vv proud of myself.