A letter from Jul 21, 2023

Dear FutureMe, This time in 3 years you will be almost 21. Now you’re still very much a child, a little girl who cries herself to sleep because she hates the person she has become. One who barely has anything to be proud of, one who can’t appreciate the people who actually love her enough and instead seeks the attention from the ones who don’t. I really hope you’re in a much better place. I hope you have found the peace you’ve been looking for. I hope you have let go of things that keep hurting you and that you’ve stopped being the reason other people are hurting. I hope you have found the kindness and empathy that have drowned deeply into the trauma, the scars, the hatred… I hope you started to forgive yourself for the many times you have been the worst imaginable person and realized that it’s not who you actually are. I hope you Can now give all that love and affection you’re full of to the right people. I hope you have finally found that true, lasting and fun friendship you have dreamt of, I hope you and Felix are still going strong, he is now the absolute love of your life and I’m sure he still will. I hope you’re living your life and you’re traveling, meeting people, creating memories and working on your well being. I hope you have watched many more sunsets and thought about how lucky we actually are. I hope mom is happier than ever, I hope Amelia has gotten more sociable and is having a great middle school experience, I hope you are having the time of your life in those amazing years, Im trying for us, I know I’m not trying enough tho but still 🐟 #caras #zacrisugalubeikaniak I hope you are now a very good driver, and skinny ofc and that you have long hair… we are loving, I hope you already do but I, I have to learn how to respect myself, how to set boundaries, how to express my feelings in a healthy way, how to be more independent, how to not cry my *** out everytime im alone with my thoughts, how to actually enjoy life. I don’t know where you’ll be in 3 years, but, either way, I’m proud of where you are, do whatever makes YOU happy. Live for yourself. Learn from your mistakes . Make your 18 year old self proud.