A letter from May 08, 2023

Dear FutureMe, I hope you’re doing well. I am not. I am not able to feel happy and i hate it. Please tell me you are still alive. I can’t see a future for myself and it’s really scary. I can’t move on. I hope you did by now. Are you still depressed? please tell me you have found joy in your life. I hope you are able to eat without beating yourself up. I hope you are able to be yourself without everyone judging you. I hope you have a good relationship with your parents. oh gosh i am crying haha. I am so scared for the third year of high school. New mentor, new classmates, new everything. I use things i look forward to as a will to live. Are you still close with Buchan? Do you still talk to your classmates of 2023? You don’t have to of course, but i am curious. Are you still the best at english in your class? Do you still crave dubble cream oreo’s and almof room yoghurt 😂? I hope you don’t because i am already getting bored of them. Did you get a new room you like? I hope you did because this room holds Trauma. maybe a little less happy question but.. Are my self harm scars still visible or did they fade after all? i am so scared they are for life. If you are still there, give nola a big kiss for me okay? It’s okay to take a break and take care of yourself. You are enough. I wish i could believe that right now, but i can’t. I have to go now, happy birthday :) Treat yourself to a big meal okay? promise me.