A letter from Mar 12, 2023

Dear FutureMe, HEELLLOOOOO HAPPY 18th BIRTHDAY LIN ! ! now now now, how's your life going lin? how have you been? are you even still here? wkwk. tell me (15 years old molin) eeeeevverryyything that has been going on, im sure i may know it later but i still wanna hear it from you. aku ingin tau semuanya. kayak hari ini makan apa? gimana harimu? apakah mtk tambah susah? masih di rohis? were you still a good person? apa kamu masih baca lookism? apa kamu masih berteman sama wawa, leli sama japri? japri masih di tegal dan belum balikin jas hujan wawa? masih temenan gak sama noer? gimana kabar dia? udah ketemu sama dhita belum? apa dia masih jadi alasanmu hidup? masih nungguin raffi? masih main volly? gimana progress nya? sudah maafin ppdb? sudah maafin bapak? sudah berdamai belum sama dirimu sendiri? sudah ikhlas belum? apakah kamu masih takut sama masa depan? apa masih ada yang kamu sesali? OH ! YOU GRADUATION SOON RIGHT? please enjoy everything while you can. im trying my best to work on my grade here hehe : D are you going to college? or working? ****, must been really hard to make a choose. please work hard and earn a lot of moneyyyy, so we can spend it on self-reward wkwk hm.. now you're an adults right? how does it feels like? how does it feel to be something that always scare you? 15yo lin is still ******* scared of being an adults, takut sama tanggung jawab seorang dewasa, takut gak bisa nikmatin hidup lagi, takut gak jadi apa apa, takut gak punya progress. aku disini masih gak bisa bayangin jadi “dewasa”. tapi gak papa, live the moment while you can. you can learn it while you live it. last but not least.. you've done well, lin im so proud of you, you're doing your best. may be the best version of yourself. kind of cringe i know, but please love yourself and people around you. its okay to make mistake. kalau kata dhita, masih ada besok, besok itu milikmu. dan gak papa untuk jadi “biasa aja”. kata dhita, kalau kamu tanya “apa nilai ku sebagai manusia kalau bukan apa-apa?”, jawabannya adalah tergantung pakai takaran siapa. so dont be harsh with yourself, treat yourself well please. its okay if no one beside you, im here. your younger lin its here, behind you. no need to be angry or hating yourself if someone go away from you. thats okay, people come and go anyways. at the end of the day, your here, alone, but not lonely. peacefully alone. forgive everyone, be a better person, be a better daughter, be a better friend. just be better than yesterday. i hope you're doing well. semoga kamu jadi orang paling bahagia di dunia. tertanda, maolin 12/03/2023