A letter from Feb 14, 2023

Dear FutureMe, you are literally getting the keys for your house march 1st. *****, you’re moving to the netherlands in less than like a couple weeks or days i dont ******* know. also, its nearly midnight and you are sat in bed with a cats paw on your head. not what i wanted to say but felt important. also, the real thing now, you are actually laying in bed thinking about the past couple years. - you miss your mum despite what happened between you two and don’t feel guilty for now reaching out for a bond. no, she hasn’t said sorry for what she did and what she did was a ******* ***** thing to do but you want a mum so bad. it’s going to be okay with or without her. cool. - you wanted to **** yourself a couple weeks ago and you’re still here. dumb ******* *****, your period you due and you’re literally living the dream life? -you miss being skinny. you are wishing you didn’t gain weight. where did she go? -this man loves you so much. like, so much. he’s asleep rn hehehe you was tempted to spit on him while he slept but couldn’t do it. u love him too. i hope you do. - you feel very conflicted right now by who you are and thats ok. you need so much time. you’re lost. - you wish your dad would spend more time with you. you remembered when your dad would beg for you to go out for a walk with him. you miss those interactions so much, you miss talking. you miss when he wouldn’t always be stuck on his phone or talking about cars. why has he become a car person? you love him so much and it’s hard for you to portray that. you’re lost. you just want him to be okay with you going for a walk now. you miss him. you miss yourself. you’re getting another tattoo soon. not sure if you are gonna actually but lets see what she does when her paycheck comes in. pl ea se be proud of yourself. you’re not feeling it rn. i know. anyway, 3 years in the future so let me ask myself some questions for you to answer on a tiktok or something. -are you still with bob? -are you married? -children? -skinny? -where have you been so far travelling wise? -worst thing that has happened to you since writing this? -did you get a dog? or a chicken? -are you healthy? -have you lost anyone? -favourite food? -biggest insecurity rn? (right now its your weight.) -relationships with sisters, mum and dad? -where are you living now? cant think of anymore. sleepy jow. sleep. sleeeeeep. night future me.