A letter from February 1st, 2023

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, Hi. I just wrote a lot. I replied to my past self, but I also wrote another letter today that should be delivered on September 9th 2023. I am doing homeschool right now. I hope you can remember those awful feelings from January-February 2023 of crying myself to sleep without my phone and being so miserable. This is the worst time of my life. By a mile. I have never felt so depressed. I am planning to go on antianxiety/depressant meds and I am seeing a psychiatrist tomorrow. I tried to overdose a few times. I lied to everyone about it. Then I thought of jumping out of the balcony. I hope 15/16 year old me is over those feelings. I want to become a better person. I hope in three years from now I’m thriving. I hope I am still alive. If I am, I am going to ask some questions and although I won’t be able to see your reply, and take your advice, I want to be able to reply to myself, in the sense that I really can take the advice before even reading it. First question: how does it feel to have no braces. I’m not insecure about my teeth and hate them and want new ones and what not, but I don’t love the braces. My next questions is this: are you still reading? Not just reading for school, but openly buying books and reading them to fall asleep. I just finished flowers for Algernon and it was really good. The next thing I want to know is are you writing? I was thinking about either making a journal, or just a full on book..or maybe even both! I wanted to call it Mentally Fat. Because, I am, In fact, Mentally Fat. I thought it would be just about my life and the struggles since kindergarten. It could be similar to flowers for Algernon, with fake (but real) progress reports as if they were starting from. My first day of kindergarten all the way to where I am now. I could continue it for a few years with the “progress reports” and see how it turns out. I hope you follow through. I want to be someone when I grow up. Not necessarily famous, but I want to make a point in this world, and grow up to be really smart. I want to be a lawyer and graduate from Northwestern university or UPenn. My next question is how are the dogs? None of them died right? (Hopefully) Any new ones? Who is working for us as help? I cannot imagine Christina is still there. A really important question coming up..What school did you end up going to? (I am going to give a brief warning that there will be a bunch of popcorn questions starting right about..now.) Did you leave after 8th? How did you manage to stay in school? (If you didn’t get kicked out) How is hockey? What do you consider your “main sport” as of today? If you didn’t leave after 8th and stayed for 9th, did you make varsity club? How was commencement? Were you field hockey/hockey/crew/any other sport captain? Probably not hockey, but I am expecting field hockey. This text question might trigger a weird PTSD. No more mental hospitals right? Especially not Charlotte Hungerford I hope. Were you Mr. Przygocki, Mrs. Giese, or Mr. Greens prefect? How is Charlotte? Who are your REAL friends? That’s ok if you have none(which I don’t expect you will) but right now I have none. And that’s okay. I’m dealing with it. My trusted adult right now is Allie Molner. I am happy with that. I already wrote the conclusion to this letter but I want to edit it and ask a few worldwide questions. Have you moved houses? Have you gotten a new phone? What new phones are there? Any pandemics? Have any family members died? I am going to end the letter now and I imagine you are not thrilled about that, but I encourage you to write one today for it to be delivered in just about 3 years or so, and make another one next month to be delivered soon. Also, when you write back to me, please make it long. Although I will not see it, I feel that you will respond in a wholesome way. By the way, have you blown up on tiktok? My recent tiktok of Dallas just got like 500k+ views and I am VERY proud. These are really fun, and emotionally therapeutic too..be good, xoxo Georgina at 12:34pm from feb12023❤️

Epilogue

about 1 month later

Hi. It’s been just over three years since I got this letter. Some answers:
No braces is great! Got them off over a year ago.
I don’t read as much...

Aeoymrn. Silghne for degnria aiotll. I shoocl osoo keli kpdcie dan ti si fro it tbu it.
Tiwre do’nt i. Ta lal.
Ogds aaltucly fn,ie rea. On neo ddei. Mnshot eflt goa fwe djeug a. Sevne kinth i gao nohtms clutylaa. Omm of got imh rited. Unnfy ctairhisn yuo netoimn. In ltef seh 0242. Adh a in i lwhie in ettnratem heowl wsa we bhcun eewentb. Tn’ddi amrtentte and yuo abtuo asw i knwo ni ho rfo ’todn emho ht!at nomhts og 22 ceon. Tlef, sivrpeuo is aws icgonm eingirttens caegr eaucebs bcak nircatish actyllau repohseeuek woh irgt!h rou iohgntt. Enbe rhee ntkhi eryas a ahs sah rfo pucelo a. ’essh oodg.
Rtmtntaee nwet i to sa moneitend, i. Fo lddeim t9h hte demdli lasdet atth morf fo to 7ht. Srehphmai astpohli aevel etrs ateptmt entw so chwih lcoohs eth a 1t,0h fo the rof th9, keew and the a ahd em staretd orf to i in lfet i in tbu nlttio enw secduii aiytluemlt ot adh. Ti saw i’m …slhcoo week well! of fiusno at nwo fsrit oh hte. Osde oshclo yict day that a eon ni larnnegi ’its eno no hte. Ayroplbb xtne i’m to gnogi ,ryae ibchr. Eamn own trhig ot gnspeaik teh you i you memebrre oldwu ewre if. Lchriea eehtr tnwe. R!yae wwo rnuoij. Reay eb lli’ i oto ihnkt trehe irneos. Ncfrae me sydut ot in add aswnt my. I inkht lilt ’ill iwta ecelglo. Elclgo!e lolceeg. .
Kabc teh i srumey nreev reaigrddsngi asbuece suotinqes tewn tuboa.
I fro edrtrenu i dtseya nutli ni sa ’absyb sa octhu whit neoccnemmtme ti ewhn ongl idd edgar i sbuecea aery i ot atls saw eohm adn reh luocd go ht9. Wsa ifen ti. Wdarakw sieegn a sugse tub eo,nveery was cnie ti ttiell i. I hwne topssr oppdtse i igond tlef usryem. I at teasl dto’n dyalep yersa kntih ekcyho rfo vei’ onw 3. I wokn. D’you eb rbbylpao kcshedo. Gusse erca ynaadswo atosnsapie ot dues ont’d i i batou tub i t,i eb. Salt i dha idsa i lhsooc asrttde tub mrebpeest ldife coeyhk to sa evlae. Omna taipscna andlemy rof reew and seinor teh eayr hirte. Avhe tw’san ti but me enbe nad ehtre mnoa wduol i. Yabb told me. .
Tlanem sohtlisap. Dstp no. Tno i’m pd,st utb elwl igdrreteg eys. Wetn ni vnere cuncetcoitn ot hc aohlistp kacb i. 5 to 6 icnes i ie’v i oterw or itsh ithnk wno bnee. Asw eavin i wwo so.
On cfetrpe. Si thaoetlrc efni. Ehwn aws her ot ni i netw njue as’byb i eemccteommnn. Ni plceou ?h?somnt at’nc shs’e vlbeiee a i dlouc oyu ujts ignaagdurt. Ktnhi tlsa edfli seh okceyh hre i orkeb dgruin elik ryea mra. 2‘4. Ithw atucgh ereng up mr. Me edmsis eh kown i. Cluod i letl. ,heylonts i’ve ti on usjt tbu lroed life tarp as egntot irelzdea fo gvmino is was i asd. Did os t,tha i t’odn ontef i mih tnkih adn tsju aobut. Ta aatyullc all. At’sth adn ko. Mi ko.
Ton ehav ohessu oevdm.
Ieohnp 17 nwo gto eht 16,.
On nespdciam.
Tsla amrnagd amy agter ided.
Dinm het ’dnot ngendi terlets htat yhea, i. I ewolh rweti flei ot ahve mreo ym.
Asw not cbak ewtri mi’ ot adn ueincton ’eygsr wtan csebaeu to i now naigwcht adn noamtya oigng grhit. To em you tbu wkon ntdaew i di,d aesbeuc i. Lceukb ym slef a padprree pu ldouc ghu nda awht ihws xent i eigv rfo and i satp nad mocse be asy. Aiwngrn ceni aehv dulco ebsecua btu e,m ttelli eparrpe enbe uodwl tonnhig a. Arey i atclya,lu ago pu did on kkttoi lwbo a. ,eteattmrn i sa swa tog i enoc nihghsit,d in kacb ckba in i iilvng the fomr olok past. Flte i adeiezlr up, aws of ahd srot eervnyoe ihnebd dan i owgnr. Iekl rfom 13 a odl reay 3202. Ilaerze and ’ditnd arey i it a itnul eatlr. Cggnnhia dna crepiut teitngg fo i my ot omrf 2022 iorflep eembmerr moeh i rabyd oen adn. 5220 it swa. On hda tinngoh i btu opthso dah syl,mfe fo i. Nda 2220 ’intdd ynemora ti swnt’a zrlieea i. Mevdo adh em hwtotui eeplop on. Oguhr hatt saw aanysw,y. On think setim ot it rkwo toikkt go a iretd i i nda leocpu idd aivlr. Otuhgh razyc ninhogt. Cncouta saldal hte kcdhea got oll. Illst smoe up ubt ts’i yb ni hanic krscahe run. Kihtn nnfuy i stop ’ndto htey ubt ’sti. Tish ni tjsu if eci,tw meos ayw ro praallel oyak seinrvue be hteer is ihgsnt a idagnre htat wnko hweer euy’ro luol’y aeppnh. Emak it oyu uto liwl and. Ouy hetre aekm nhkti ti ou,t be reehw setmi otdn’ btu lwli ’yluol you lliw inteyidelf. Kno?w ohw idd nda ti eucsbae i i do. Fo mtise made flie tou rtdeska my hte ti eedpest of i. Is efterpc wno ton it irtgh. All ta. Not neo tib. Yanm i stgsrgule ltsli have. Rfo tno ti ofr ta ttha do uebcsea i toko i m’i neo ltrufgae ea,dnrtg kown ot thwa utb wno dan do i aevh toinp. Soooooo is sacyr so ilef. Tuhtr si’t the. Mognv,i go, heav sjut otunc hpnpea, alnrde,e loufrsey saeeubc ot odnrua si nda rvee eekp emco lonses adn si you u,eyttmalil utb on gtinsh eht eth tebiggs eepopl tbu iev’ oyln ot soenpr ktcis htat yuo. .
.
Ouy i vole.
Fof nigsing.
.
- rhacm :5m35p e,igronag ht6, 2206.
💕.

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