A letter from February 1st, 2023

Dear FutureMe, Hi. I just wrote a lot. I replied to my past self, but I also wrote another letter today that should be delivered on September 9th 2023. I am doing homeschool right now. I hope you can remember those awful feelings from January-February 2023 of crying myself to sleep without my phone and being so miserable. This is the worst time of my life. By a mile. I have never felt so depressed. I am planning to go on antianxiety/depressant meds and I am seeing a psychiatrist tomorrow. I tried to overdose a few times. I lied to everyone about it. Then I thought of jumping out of the balcony. I hope 15/16 year old me is over those feelings. I want to become a better person. I hope in three years from now I’m thriving. I hope I am still alive. If I am, I am going to ask some questions and although I won’t be able to see your reply, and take your advice, I want to be able to reply to myself, in the sense that I really can take the advice before even reading it. First question: how does it feel to have no braces. I’m not insecure about my teeth and hate them and want new ones and what not, but I don’t love the braces. My next questions is this: are you still reading? Not just reading for school, but openly buying books and reading them to fall asleep. I just finished flowers for Algernon and it was really good. The next thing I want to know is are you writing? I was thinking about either making a journal, or just a full on book..or maybe even both! I wanted to call it Mentally Fat. Because, I am, In fact, Mentally Fat. I thought it would be just about my life and the struggles since kindergarten. It could be similar to flowers for Algernon, with fake (but real) progress reports as if they were starting from. My first day of kindergarten all the way to where I am now. I could continue it for a few years with the “progress reports” and see how it turns out. I hope you follow through. I want to be someone when I grow up. Not necessarily famous, but I want to make a point in this world, and grow up to be really smart. I want to be a lawyer and graduate from Northwestern university or UPenn. My next question is how are the dogs? None of them died right? (Hopefully) Any new ones? Who is working for us as help? I cannot imagine Christina is still there. A really important question coming up..What school did you end up going to? (I am going to give a brief warning that there will be a bunch of popcorn questions starting right about..now.) Did you leave after 8th? How did you manage to stay in school? (If you didn’t get kicked out) How is hockey? What do you consider your “main sport” as of today? If you didn’t leave after 8th and stayed for 9th, did you make varsity club? How was commencement? Were you field hockey/hockey/crew/any other sport captain? Probably not hockey, but I am expecting field hockey. This text question might trigger a weird PTSD. No more mental hospitals right? Especially not Charlotte Hungerford I hope. Were you Mr. Przygocki, Mrs. Giese, or Mr. Greens prefect? How is Charlotte? Who are your REAL friends? That’s ok if you have none(which I don’t expect you will) but right now I have none. And that’s okay. I’m dealing with it. My trusted adult right now is Allie Molner. I am happy with that. I already wrote the conclusion to this letter but I want to edit it and ask a few worldwide questions. Have you moved houses? Have you gotten a new phone? What new phones are there? Any pandemics? Have any family members died? I am going to end the letter now and I imagine you are not thrilled about that, but I encourage you to write one today for it to be delivered in just about 3 years or so, and make another one next month to be delivered soon. Also, when you write back to me, please make it long. Although I will not see it, I feel that you will respond in a wholesome way. By the way, have you blown up on tiktok? My recent tiktok of Dallas just got like 500k+ views and I am VERY proud. These are really fun, and emotionally therapeutic too..be good, xoxo Georgina at 12:34pm from feb12023❤️