A letter from Feb 01, 2023

Dear FutureMe, Lately it's been bad. I think about ******* myself almost everyday at least once. I can't do it though. I have to keep going. I have to prove that I can live well to both myself and my narcissistic mother who is the cause of my lack of will to live. I dream of the day when I have my own family away from her, a family over which she will never have control, when I'll be able to speak my mind freely since she will not be in a position of power anymore and able to shut me up whenever she dislikes my words. I have to see that day. I will not let her win nor will I ever thank her for the way she raised me. I hope to never forget the way I am feeling right now when everything is unfair.