A letter from Dec 22, 2022. 12:17AM

To the bravest and badest *****, Hey, how are you? By this time, you probably graduated (hopefully). I hope things are finally making sense. I don't really know what to say exactly but I just felt the urge to write this message for you. Anyway, I went out earlier, kasama ko sila Yana, Nas and Jes. Saglit lang but it was fun. Sana kapag nareceive mo 'to, you're still with the same group of friends. Sana sila pa rin ang main gaes mo kasi honestly, no one can replace them. Bukas may finals exam ako sa web programming, nakabahan ako. I hope I get at least a passing grade and I pass the subject. I'm not aiming sa mataas na grade, I just hope I pass the subject. Anyway, going back, dahil nga 2nd anniversary ngayon nila Yana and Nas, I just felt so happy and emotional at the same time. Happy kasi of course, I've been there since day one and just look at them now. Emotional kasi hindi ko rin alam. Siguro kasi may part sakin na nagawonder what it feels like? Na maybe deep down, I'm still wondering what it would feel like if I was still with Sed and kami yung magacelebrate ng anniveraries? I'd like to think I'm over it. Na I already accepted and moved on from everything but I think there's this miniscule part of me na andun pa rin. And my heart will forever ache for every version of me and every universe that didn't end up with them. Kapag nabasa mo 'to, siguro you'd just laugh it all off. Maybe you'd really be over him. Tell me, did you remain friends? Nag uusap pa rin ba kayo? Are they still there for you? Nagtransition na ba sya? I hope they're in a good place. Masesend 'to sayo ng December 10 and in two days, it'll be Sed's birthday. Don't forget to greet him. But hey, this is not about my feelings about them. I don't want this to be another letter that's for about them (though I might make something that's about them). My third year of being a college student is hard. Everything's just starting to get back to normal so naga adjust ang lahat kasi syempre nagastart pa lang ulit ang pandemic. I really hope I make it. 2022's been tough. Everything's been tough since Sed and I broke up but hey, I love myself now more than ever. I'm healing, learning and thriving. I'm talking to someone right now. Her name's Jade. Well, hindi ko sya girlfriend and I'm not sure if she'll be my girlfriend. Are you still with her? If not, what happened? How did you guys ended? I hope hindi ako naging ******* kasi hindi deserve yun ni Jade. She's been good to me since day one. Sooo, are you working now? I hope pinursue mo yung pagiging IT kasi that's my dream. I want to be like our kuya. If you did, I hope you're rocking it. I believe in you. I will forever root for you. If nagdecide kang di ipursure yung dream job natin, where do you want to work na? But don't worry, kahit ano namang piliin mong gawin in the future, I will still be proud. Anyway, speaking of our kuya, how is he and ate? How's Peach? I hope she grows up to be *** HAHAHAHA. Pero di pa rin naman natin masasabi kasi kapag nareceive mo 'to ilang taon pa lang rin naman ang nakalipas. But if she really turns out to be ***, please protect her. If hindi man sya tanggapin ng parents nya and ng buong pamilya, please do the honors. Be there for them, make sure they feel how much you love them regardless of their gender. Also, how's the fam? I hope mom and dad are healthy. Si nanay and tatay din. And of course, ate AC. 2022, aside from being heartbroken, I felt really neglected. Sana by this time, you don't feel that anymore. If you are with someone, I hope they make you feel loved, heard, and seen. Please, love yourself more. You've been through a lot. Malayo ka pa pero malayo ka na. Don't give up. If no one's there for you, don't worry, love. You have yourself and you are more than enough. Hanggang dito na lang muna siguro, I'll definitely make more letters in the coming months or years soooo enjoy reading them in the future!! I hope these letters remind you of how far you've come and how brave you've been in facing them. No one can stop you kasi si Marielle ka. You can do anything you want. Take care of yourself, our family and especially our heart. Sobrang gold yung heart mo so don't ever let someone break it again. Love, your 2022 self