A letter from Nov 25, 2022

Dear FutureMe, today, I was doing chores from 12 pm, well, 12 pm till 6 pm yeah remember how I was complaining about papa? today he took me to get my eyesight checked, ON HIS OWN WILL yeah even though it was after two months, I thought hey maybe he will I don't know, spend some father-daughter time, he even bought me Mcdonalds. WE ATE TOGETHER HELL YEAH so I got a little excited, maybe too much, but after getting my eyes checked I had to go home because Rida was sick and humza is a useless *****. when I got home, I cleaned the kitchen, then queen dado came upstairs and spent the rest of the day insulting me while making me do chores. i told papa and I thought he cared he sounded like he cared it was enough. was. his texts went from "I'm proud of you" to "I'm busy at work" I didn't think much of it, at first, but when he came back, he told me to make him chai, and like he knew I was tired, and he called me useless 'cause I didn't. it reminded me of when he called me crazy because I didn't want to spend my life doing chores. a crazy person. for wanting a life out of housework. it hurts it hurts like hell to think that just for a day, he was my dad. today he proved me wrong. he's legally my dad, legally my responsibility. I wish I had someone who loved me. no one does. at least I have allah, he is sufficient for me, but I wish, I had a fatherly figure. today when I heard humza scream due to a loss in his game, It annoyed me knowing he gets to skip all house chores to play games, while I have to work all day and miss out on studying because of our difference in body parts. it annoys me, people tell me to be better to him so that he doesn't talk bad about me to his kids for mistreating him, but what about the fact that he may be mistreating me? that I might tell my kids bad of him? does it not matter because I am a woman? what the **** is this. I wanna leave so badly I hate this I want out of this I wanna live by myself I wish people loved me I wish my uncle and aunts would stop finding me annoying I thought I didn't care what they'd think but I do while I'm reading this I hope you're happy I hope you're in the best state of Imaan I hope you found someone who loves you the way our families didn't I'm going to send you this on you're 20th birthday, 3 years from now. i hope you found a way out of this situation. bye.