A letter from Oct 19, 2022

Dear FutureMe, yesterday BTS enlisted. it might be one of the worst school days ever. it wasn't my intention, i only wanted to tell him why i stopped talking to him when we were bestfriends. it wasn't my fault. yet i feel guilty. i hope his gf doesn't want me to to die till then. i hope I'm happier by then. i didn't believe what they said about him. I'll never believe that. but i do believe that this is one sided and he does not give a ****. he didn't care when yest i told him how ****** my day was. but he was and is having a rough time too. but why am I the only one who initiates to talk to him IRL? i know it's one sided then why did he say it's mutual? i know my friend is right atp. I'll move on. god i shouldn't get involved with boys in future it always causes drama or is it my fault? bts enlisted. BTS saved me before. i hope they save me in future too. i feel guilty that im not able to keep up with them now. i didn't even watch their latest concert. i hope future sudi has found someone or something that makes her happy. and makes her feel loved. and she knows she's the baddest alive. i hope she's in the uni she wanted to be in. and that she's not stuck here. — with love, oct18 2022 sudi. [oct19 2022 sudi] also also i really hope you got better academically and you're not this mentally ****** up and can handle emotions for ***** sake. dk dc about the boy might mess up or distance myself again lol