A letter from Sep 23, 2022

Hey you, One day a guy hits me up on grindr. He is cute, funny, witty and to top it all off has a great bum, but then what's the catch? well, he is in a relationship, Bummer. However, I still dropped my number just in case and I am glad I did because to my luck he calls me the next day, and I’ve been looking forward to his calls ever since. I may not call him as much or “at all” as he would say, but it’s not out of my lack of interest in talking to him but rather my own insecurities of him not answering when I call, something which I hope you’ve worked on. He called me one of his queer friends and I might just be that to him. He’s my first queer friend but that’s not all he is to me. For me he is a friend I can talk with for hours on end about absolutely nothing, face time with for no apparent reason, a friend with whom I can play board games with, watch shows with, not agree with, a friend around whom I can be silly and share some of my most embarrassing stories with, a friend with whom I can share my problems with, a friend who just also happens to be queer, but maybe I can do all those things with him because he is queer, I don’t know. I met him at a somewhat interesting point in his life. On the surface it may seem like I helped him get through a difficult time but upon deeper inspection you’ll find he helped me just as much if not more. I spent the night before the morning I flew out, with him and his boyfriend talking about *** culture, musicals, Disney, even coming up with a theory of our own on how to tell if someone’s a top, bottom or vers based on what Disney shows they liked, things that I haven’t or really couldn’t talk about with my other friends. Hitting me with a sense of realization on the kind of friendships I have missed out on but more importantly the kind of friendships I have ahead of myself. I see him be unapologetically himself, I see him be out to his family, I see his family love him not despite it but partly because of it and I hope, no I pray I see a little bit of you in him. I don’t know if he’s a part of your life anymore, I hope that he is but even if he’s not, know that he was a part of mine. He mattered to me even if for a brief period. I told him once that maybe this is just an intersection where both our lives meet before we go our separate ways, to which he responded “what’s the point, I’ve had many intersections like these and they amount to nothing” maybe this one won’t either for him, nevertheless it did for me. He went on to say, “I hope that this is more than an intersection” and I hope that he was right. Sincerely, Me.