A letter from Aug 15, 2022

Dear FutureMe, hi, you're 18 thats so weird in my head i definitely didn't think i would make it to 18 i hope im not still deppressed ive been for way too long - hope im still in australia and probs finshed my HSE exams -i hope both my parents are healthy and here -im too scared about grandparents but i hope theyre around as well i feel empty right now u know this- look i know youll be looking back and hating on me but im trying my best? probably not my best but mentally im so done im not gonna sit here and blame school or my parents its all me trust me ik look i need to sleep i have to wake up for fajr tmrw oh god im crying now, also rlly need to clean my room and get it toghther also i told u before my instagram is gonna get disabled i hope theres a boy or a 'man' be good to mama and baba they deserve so much more than this i hope ill go to egypt this year, youre probably looking back at memories from there or maybe we didnt end up going zeina is 13 whihc is scary omg rokaia is 8 god time flies i rmeber holding her little pink face in my arms on the bed in egypt look anyway since im not allowed on my phone the leptop is very loud an i need to sleep goodnight- ill reply to this and make it public / if i didnt im deadrip god i hope im still alive or i kinda want to die anyway thank u btw for everything u did for me and are still doing i love you ps it took me a while to write that i really do love you oh i havent sent this in 4 days oops i just reread the letter i think i was extra emotional then idk why life doesnt suck THATT much anyway bye bye