A letter from Aug 12, 2022

Dear Brooke, 22. You’re 22 years-old. You’re no longer a teenager. How do you feel? You were a teenager for 6 years. 6 interesting and rocky and funny and uncomfortable and breathtaking years. My only hope is that the day you turned 20 was one for the history books — The History Book of Brooke Yamada. Gosh. How are you?? Seriously. How do you feel? I’m writing this to you two nights before you leave for college. Before you set off into the (literal) wilderness for five days before starting your life. Starting over. Staring fresh. And, most importantly, starting something. I don’t know what it is, but whatever it was, I know it was magical. I’m 18 right now. Still a teenager. I don’t know how to feel. Everyone asks me if I’m nervous. If I’m excited. If I’m sad. If anything, I’m just nostalgic. I can’t help but look around my room and see myself everywhere. In the book shelves. In front of the mirror. On the floor. At my desk. On the bed. Everywhere. This room, no matter who the house belongs to when you’re seeing this or whoever it will belong to, will always be ours. I have so many questions for you. I think the one I’m wondering most is if you found someone. Or maybe you had someone and it didn’t work out. Did you every say those three words to someone special? What was it like if you did? If you didn’t it’s okay. Really. And believe me, it doesn’t always feel okay to not have someone — believe me, I’d know haha. But it’s okay. He’s coming. He’ll come along one day when the time is right. But if you did find someone, then I can’t wait to hear all about him. Is he like one of the characters from your novels? Or is he better because he’s real? I hope both. Don’t ever settle, Brooke. You’ve been through too much to ever accept less for yourself. Also, your career. How’s that going? Jobs? The other job? I wonder if anything happened. I guess I’ll find out. It’s strange. I want to know so much about the future and yet I don’t because I know it’s coming. It’s one of those “life is weird” moments but in a good way. Friends. I hope you met your people. Oh, did you ever end up rushing? I know we were debating that but my guess is that you went ahead and did it for the experience and to meet people. If you did pledge, then I hope you were happy. Also. HOW WAS THE WHITE OUT???? I cannot WAIT to experience that. I feel like you’re gonna cry when you read this because you’ll have fond memories and then be sad that it’s over. I hope you cry. Remember what we said: if you’re afraid of doing something because you know how hard it’ll be to leave, do it because that means you’re living. I hope you lived, Brooke. I hope you lived. I think I’ve said this before but I just have so many questions. Major. Jobs. Love. Friends. Mental health. Academics. Did you forgive them? For your sake I hope you did. You deserve that, Brooke. You deserve it. This letter is more of just for you to remember. Remember the girl you were before you left. Reflect. Cry. Laugh. Smile. I can’t wait to see you. Truly. I love you. Brooke