A letter from Jul 21, 2022

Hi, 20. Wow. I'm not sure whether to be excited or afraid. Probably a little bit of both. And I hope right now I'm reading this with a huge grin on my face telling my younger self (16 year old me) that I should be mostly excited. There are a thousand things I want to say but at the same time I don't want to. What if this letter finds me in a horrible place and reading my teenage dreams breaks me even more. Whatever, I shouldn't think like that. You're still young anyway, even though to me 20 seems lightyears away. I've just reread my letters from 14 & 15 year old me and even though I look different, have matured and am not as cringy, I realize that the more we have grown up, the more we realize we haven't at all. Which is a funny thing to think about. So about me. 16 and 2 months. I'm sitting in my bed typing this in my I <3 NYC shirt wondering if there will be an apocalypse in the next 4 years. I'm confused about life and uncertain about my future. I am approaching my last year of high school, very excited for it. I love my school, my friends, my dog, my mom, my room, squish mallows, Starbucks, shopping, the movies: Call me by your name, La La Land, The Parent Trap, 16 Candles, The Perks of Being a Wallflower. My favorite artists are Frank Ocean, Taylor Swift, Conan Gray, Steve Lacy, Lana DelRay, Billy Joel, Ricky Montgomery & many more. I love iced coffee & goldfish. My dreams. I want to have success, achievement but above all happiness. I want to be closer to my ideal person. I want to have met amazing new people some that hopefully become my friends. Oh and stay in touch with some of my friends I have now. Especially Anna, Yaretzi, Tara & Alisha my best friends. I want to have been in at least one semi-serious relationship and be as head over heels for someone as I was with James. I want to have stepped out of my comfort zone many times and tried new things. I want to have a better work ethic and accomplish the things I want to. I want to be loved. I want to be in a place where I can be my true self remember her? I hope so. I'm not exactly sure what I'd like to be majoring in at uni or even what uni I'd like to go to. At the moment I'm kinda in love with the idea of NYU or UBC. But if i'm not at either that's okay as long as I'm in a good university. I want to be beautiful inside and out and to be sure of it. If you've accomplished dreams I've yet to dream good for you. I'm proud. My regrets would be if I didn't go for things I wanted because I was afraid. If I didn't love people whole heartedly because I thought they'd only be temporary. If I let people I love walk out of my life because I couldn't be bothered to show them how much I appreciate them. If I didn't give life my all and didn't take THAT LEAP. I don't know which one i'm talking about but i'm sure you do. “Everything will be okay in the end. If it’s not okay, it’s not the end.” Ok now I'm going to go and live the next 4 years and then you can send another of these to i don't know the 25 or 30 year old Scarlett. See you in 4! PS: I'm gonna go give Bootsy a hug for you. In my others letters I've asked future me to do that but you know.. LOVE YOU SO MUCH!