A letter from Jan 19th, 2022

Dear FutureMe, Hello AGAAIN!! Wow, you made it another year! You know, first, I’m so so proud of you, wow. I honestly did not think we would have made it this far. Now, i don’t know what we have been through this next years, but I know that since you are reading this letter, it means it was not able to take us down!! I don’t know if you remember a lot from 2021 but boyyy do I. So far the WORST year of my life lol. (Hope you continued the crying pictures btw. They actually help in the long way. Trust me). We never got to the part of trying to unalive ourself, but believe that I tried my best fighting it away every **** time. Omg, so rude of me. HAPPY ******** BIRTHDAY!! Over 20 years old. Time does really fly by. It’s kind of scary tbh. But I’m wondering, how are we? Amazing? Bad? Happy? Sad? Out of 1/10? (Right now, surprisingly a solid 9/10!!). Ehh, this year, we started working out, and for real this time!!! Got a membership on a gym for Christmas and it’s surprisingly fun to be there (don’t worry, I will start paying myself. Won’t let my mom use that much money each month on me). I’m trying to go at least three times a week when there’s school and work, and maybe 4-5 in vacations. So far, so good. Self esteem has gone up and so has my mood. Currently working on myself physically but also as a person. BUT REMEMBER: if you are reading this thinking “it all really went downhill from there”, then remember where it started. It started when you realised the hard truth about who really wants the best for you. You. You have to make yourself that person again if you lost it. NO ONE ELSE is responsible for our own happiness, so make it your responsibility. We did not go through all that **** for years, only for you to give up completely. I’m not going to sugarcoat it anymore, and neither should you (this might sound really harsh if I actually have my life together haha). Be a better me! Be a better you! Just remember to breath, okay? You got this. Always have, always will be. Even if you are all alone, we can do this. Know that I will love you no matter what. If you ever feel alone in this world, embrace it. Since im always with you, you are never truly alone, and you never will be. Be at peace with the loneliness and use this opportunity to make us an even better person! Stay strong but don’t forget your mental state too. Happy birthday! Make it till next year! I promise myself that I will survive!