apologize letter from 2022

to the person i once loved, hello! isn't today a wonderful day to begin? i hope you can read this if you are using your current email address today. this year, 2022, i've had many life-changing realizations, one of which is about you. i don't want to hold any grudges to anyone. i have a lot of guilt, keith, especially for the person i once loved. you know, i can't be mad at you because i've loved you so much that i've put you first before myself and my family. since the day we split up, i've had a lot of thoughts, and one of them is to apologize for doing that. for doing something i shouldn't have done, but i think it's enough for the pain you've caused me. actually, i wanted to write this to you this year, but I'm not sure when we'll be able to communicate again. but, hopefully, i will be able to speak with you again this year. people around me say that we don't need to have closure, but i think it should be done—so that the pain we had to each other will be left behind with the memories we created together. i may have been immature in doing what I did to you, but i would like to apologize for everything. i guess the pain taught me enough? i was going to ask your friends about your situation, whether you're okay or not, and there's not a day that goes by that i don't think of you and the memories we've shared, but that's already in the past. we can never go back to the past. but thank you! thank you for being my puppy love and first love. 6 years of loving you—and no one will ever be able to beat you in my heart. and because of you, i learned how to patiently love someone. "of all the love stories i've heard, ours will always be a fairytale to me." if i have to choose again, even if it does not deserve my heart, i will choose you over and over again. i know you know that you are the only person i loved. you are the only person i loved despite of your flaws and i will always accept you as you are, but i know i will truly love someone again. not now, but in the future, when i am willing to share everything in my heart again. that person, i know, deserves my heart. (sabi mo, eh hshahshah) but you know, i am not still tired of trying to love you again. however, this will be the last pain from our story. anyway, i'd like to tell you about my healing process. healing is healing is healing. I put myself in a dark place where i became depressed. 2021 will always be remembered as the worst year of my life. while confessing to my mother that i wanted to commit suicide, i was also aware that my mother had a heart condition. we split up at the same time and broke each other's promises. we inflicted harm on one another. but, you know, i made the decision to be strong for my future. i may have a pure heart, but i am exhausted. i'm sick of being a nice person because all i get in this life is pain. no, everything will be worthwhile. also, i've been dreaming about you since january 2022. i'm not sure why, but i dreamed about you and your family. i can't sleep early either because i'm having flashbacks from the past, which is one of the reasons i'm writing this letter to you. dili kaya san pasensya ko na maurit sa imo, sa tuod lang. siguro ginapirit ko an sadiri ko maurit para lang maka-move on sa imo. aram mo pati an ginhatag mo sa akon, gin-preserve ko maayo sa isad na box. i hope you kept the letters and everything else i gave you. i worked really hard on everything, especially the gifts. the reason i'm selling some things before is to give you a gift without using my parents' money. those things came from my heart, keith. grabe, noh? pinalangga ko na talaga ikaw pati man an pamilya mo. how i wish i can talk with kendra again. saksi ako tuna san baby pa siya hasta yana. i know, we're both happy with the life we choose and live. i hope you find happiness in everything, keith. i know some things changed, but i hope i can recognize you again as the person i once loved. you know what? i want to see you as a more successful man than you were before. i know you're capable of doing anything. i also hope you're happy with your current relationship, if you have one. i'm guessing you did a lot more to your current relationship than you did to me before? i have a lot of information about the current girls you're talking to in 2022 because someone told me so, but I stopped listening to their information because that is no longer my responsibility in your life. i hope you treat your girlfriend better than you did to me because i know, she deserves all the love you have. it's unjust because you treat someone with the bare minimum i begged before. but as we grew older, i realized that you finally learn to love someone better. and that will be the most great achievement i will see in you if we ever meet again without any hatred in heart. i'm not sure where we are this year. i believe you are in cebu, while i am in manila, learning and planning for the future we desire. i hope you know that the love you brought to me will live on in my heart forever. in the end, you are the beginning of my love. my youth will not be remembered without you. please contact me once you have received this letter. if i never hear from you, i hope you will accept my apology, even if it takes years, i'll wait for it. p/s: ikaw lang by nobita will always remind me of my unconditional love to you. anyway, advance graduation day! - apee.