A letter from Dec 26th, 2021

Peaceful right?

Dear Future Me, Hey! Long time no see, obviously its been a moment. How is life going? How are your grades? Hope you got the grades you really wanted to get, well us. Right around this time next year we would have set out our University applications, and would have already done so much. I am so proud of you. I know you could so much. I love you. Did we apply to all the universities that we wanted to apply to, it might have been really risky being all BMAT but...? Hope we did that application to Cambridge? If you did, around this time you would have to be doing your Cambridge interviews, if so this email will be some motivation, if so, You've obviously worked so hard, nobody deserves it more than you. I know how hard you've worked (yeah duh I'm you). You are just as capable as everyone else that is going to be there. Please just do you A-Level revision and you will be fine. You have done the hardest part. I can promise you that. Well until you reach medical school but you already know that. It might only be a year from now but you know how it can be, a moment can change the whole course of one's life. How are your friends? Still friends with all the people you made friends with? Even better made more friends? Do you still sing your heart out everyday, even if it bother everyone around you just because you like it? Do you still play the Piano? How's it going with learning the guitar? I hope its going better than what going with right now- How's the dog? How's Dad and our Sister doing? Do we get the diagnosis that we've been waiting for? (probably not but its a good wish to have). How's it been in the relationship department? Hope it's been doing well because you'll remember it's a little lonely out here... Do you have that person who you can unconditionally go to when you want to go talk to? Someone that I really need right now. I really do hope everything is going much better than what is going now. Most importantly, how have you been mentally? Really? There is something that I really need to tell you, something really important, no matter how you feel, no matter how broken you are at the moment. I will always love you. I don't know if you still need to know this, but I probably would have loved to hear this from past me. There is nothing that could stop me from loving you. No matter what, little you will love you with all she has. P.S. Faith says Hi Written, To, 16 Year old you. 17 Year old you.

Epilogue

42 minutes later

Hi past me,

Oh how much I would love to scoop you up and give you the biggest hug ever. I'm so happy you decided to live. Best. Decision. Ever....

Of rleesaid yejelrw uyro stih you ot a tpyar, aery ielgh,tgwhti tn'aer uyo oslt rfsit tog wetn nda stlo. Adrlnee elov rfyeolus ouy gnhti al,l to fo swa teh egtsigb that. Thta all lelray satrtme tats'h adn. Cahse uoyr eivg ls,inge ouy notiteant, aartdsdsn i lehgstits yuo of and on ilslt eth cna ibt neolrg vahe owh dirsea ys,a gutohh suyg. . . Lnoy gohhut ctrneyle. Ithnk ggoni heav ayw i dogni ear ed,e adn ear rou eagdsr wsmoeea rou ongl ,aseewom to we we a to illts *baa, og! lewl dpeorcam.
Sedalrei sjut ckab adn og tied c'ant i( i ntgh)yani. .
Aynm have idfern,s so eanins edam 'ist oyu. Bgine a to adn cna ikle ysgu ktal mnahu glraeru uoy. .
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Ni dna codtro a we a thna go laicdme ,uejn odruet dcdeied scharree eocbem aemd isaesvm noit to. Cnses,eic btaou ouy ot do ot ippadle wto ginihtkn acbsyllai unartal were ediedcd dan. Dan dan nui reasdg nwo to tanw yisitihob,scp uoy a eaoewms refsfo twih beomce otw. I ew ti od anc ithkn. Tcerlunyr aoutb igknhint ear ot igong uyo lcu uamrhd ro. Ucl offre if egivs peedsnd yuo hte. At ew rmfo eth roeefb ghirt edicdde rewe hrtgi m,eit eerdcetj btu mdeese nietwvri,e uoy yeht cdaibgmre ghtouh tif got lday,s a it. Aveh arye, ltas sith redniga em aettdsrhe nigmniagi dulwo. Hm,uc nggoi egthiyvern heva nworg but ew os dna llew so is. .
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Nac e,otmnm teh, it ecoms nihgtany acn newh a ni it ot anhcge. Deotcrnii uoy orf obok to whleo uoy a noe ni all orthw eitrfdnfe onit flie it to ktoo saw reda. Uyo ediddec reevy woflol ot dan yuor ayss, uter wtah tseady tis trahe.
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Iratug ear tou eht ylap atreh eth i nad eavh iongg we vn,m!pog!iri) ym ot i ianop, regat gsni si say i slilt d(an. Yaok ist od scrhod cnat' ubt few a yuo. . . Ewll ac'tn mthe inogg etrga sti smto btu uyo do of. Also a lvnoii eth and elrayl kpeicd uv'oye rfo rnngayei ai,gna lolce pu. Sdda yelbalstou iscmu oyu tmei gilntka icsk utaob hte i acn eltl oyu of lal. .
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At god the my of aer tssire dad eoeswma si hte foot b,de indgo nulcrrety dan neigpsel. On was ti aabrdo prtsi mnay so wnte ouy caryz. Nneedepncied oyu uoy dxpeolre. Feer a hocac the ceni ikiw you ni pearo monhtpa nad instota a gto aws nnlood ot of rdie eht enve by. Oslecr, in inpa eth litls gto sirtes ub'tst oru oru uhcm i nda. Acem teur uyo yruo mlaelsr eth vomed iwsh omo,r inot. Floros its mroaeny teh za!cry epatcr tn'rae.
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We tgo tffsu ndetaw tsoordc' teh fo thwi ew dgdeosnia whit mtos teh. Otu tager yuo ,rpaetyh tihrnegevy retdun tog and. Ocbenu had akbc, this orwk emda uoy hhidarssp salwya ti ew ubt amny esecaub ew ,yrea. Eadeecsd,r yuro your si much igogn sraieinmg feni rtetyp vhea elspe. Tge isllt atht ot whti sdesnpeior mnaertett aer ouy otg awnigit btu edsdangio. Oeisnsprde mignka het no aemdiicnot tmie saw eswor hte nasgcui hte ouy ta wree. Os wg,ro a mchu nwe twih isllt idcetmonia lkie ot n!speor ouy era adh but nwe eth.
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Thhugo esnil,g yb hioecc bmyea ew now sti tsill. Rof eenb amsrt teh uossrti tbu giong vhae kpee uyo lshoesa hrtee. Ni you ihtw lafl ugy usb a on hte did vloe. . Vene mih uyo esopk ot touhgh nvere. My,a imh p,u ense and a azr!cy it guhhot oyu uoy cnise otbau asw llsti ntkhi tlo ajnyrau epdpop he imh 'vhtena. Irwrongy the but tib awsnt i nikht thaer htwa sit a. Ot oyru llist nda yuo cpaleis ttha owh all e,vne teh we will btu lal eisntl chiiesfm eudacs ouy aveh urlobest of itsh dan atht yrae tdno' snooeme hvae lal vhea. Fo yruo tub lla, fo reiesald to repsno the yuo uoy ot ktal all atkl eht stom oe,lpyn 2202 in irndsef illw uoy tmso. Lefsoury.
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Reday art,eg i elynm,lat enbe ehva wo!amese gitetng osckm rof gdoni uor. A elvel as won od na scihpsy nashw,fles yuo laos losa. Thgi,r pruesu ieyltcva yse uoy yuo hte tthas ot tbjusec flei tnaw ni hte nwo si ujsetbc daeth,. Fnuyn is tta?h who.
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Sp. Ih raey to aisd esh todl i oag tath oals me tifha a. Llo.

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