A letter from Dec 15th, 2021

Dear FutureMe, Holy. Frickin'. Crap. I just got asked out. Or he asked me out. I don't even know if I like him. I just know he's really kind. I know he makes me laugh and we're kind of on the same level. I just know that when it came down to it, something in me wanted to ask him out. Maybe it was my thirst for drama, maybe it was how much I just want love, want something, maybe it was how he makes me smile and laugh and he's actually kinda cute, in a him sorta way. But I'm going on my first date in 2 days. I'm going on my first date with Lukesh Muzumdar. I never thought I would be going on my first date this early. ^th grade. I never thought I would be going on my first date with him. With Lukesh. But here we are. We're going to FTC after school. Braelyn and Ava are coming too, sitting at another table, observing. Braelyn said she'd buy. I'm so thankful for her. I'm lying to my parents to go out with this guy. I'm telling them I'm meeting Braelyn and Ava and that we;'re gonna hang out for a bit and I'll come home. That's all true, except for the fact that it's Lukesh. The fact that it's a date. My first date. I thought my parents would be here to see this, but I know the answer. I know the reaction. And I want to make this choice myself. Will it be awkward? Who am I kidding? Of course it will be awkward. But you guys can get over it. You're friends. You like him as a friend and you're just two friends hanging out at a coffee shop after school. Oh no. Everyone will be there everyone always is. Especially with it being the last day of the 1st semester the whole grade will be there. The whole school! But you're just friends hanging out. He might even bring James Owen or his friend Parker for "emotional support." Then we'll really be just friends hanging out. I might have to say, that at the end of the "date", that I need to be just friends right now. That I like him too, but that for now I just want to be his friend. I wanna hang out, I wanna maybe go to the dance with him, maybe would could even go on more "dates". But I'm not ready for a full on relationship right now, that I need time. But that's all 2 days away. I'm going on my first date and it's going to be amazing. Because whether or not me and Lukesh ever amount to something, we get to hang out at a coffee shop and explore uncharted territory together. And we'll have fun. We'll do good. Because we're friends.