A letter from Oct 31st, 2021

Dear FutureMe, I am writing this while my menstrual cramps is kicking in. I am 16 years old now. I celebrated my birthday last Wednesday, 4 days ago. Today is the last day of October, year 2021, and I decided to write a letter again. I remember doing this once or twice already, just not quite sure what is it about and what email did I put in, but I want to do it again and maybe every year now and I actually planned to write this letter on my birthday but I procrastinated so here it is. Why did I even talked about that, it wouldn't matter, would it? Anyway... How are you? I chose to deliver this letter 5 years from now so you're 21 in that time, am I right? I assume you're only a few months away from finally graduating. How do you feel? Are you okay? Or stressing about something related to school? Or family? Or is it a personal thing? If I would try to guess, I'd say it's about academic stuff. I'm guessing you haven't changed and still pressuring yourself about things like that (I just hope it's lesser than the way it was because if not, oh no poor you.) My advice would be (wow past self advising her future self), just carry on. You know? Don't think a lot, just do. You know you'll get through it, and it will pass. Take it easy, you got it. If the situation sucks, endure it for the mean time. It will go away soon, just maybe not in that specific time or day. Have faith. God will help--I mean God is already helping you. Again, if you haven't changed, you'd feel like He's not but at the end you'll realize He actually was helping you, and you're just too stubborn that you overlooked it (That is, if you haven't changed. But I hope you already did.) Be excited, if you're not. Think about it, it's what I've always wanted (or we, because you're me). You're in the situation which your past self have wished for. You're always in the middle of what your past self have prayed for. It might seem just normal or small, you know graduating? But that's your dream ever since and you're just a half step away from achieving it! Be proud! I am proud of you, so be too. I don't know the struggles and challenges you faced in college, but you were able to surpass it! You've overcome so many, and will continue to overcome. I believe you will, I have faith in you. I won't include here a part of comforting you if things turned out the way it wasn't supposed to because I told you I believe that everything you did turned out just right. That's how huge my trust in you is. I'm not considering those possibilities because I totally believe that you will succeed, I'm sure of it. So please, if ever you're doubting yourself right now there, remember the trust your past self have in you. If you're feeling hopeless, surrender to the Lord. If you don't have enough trust and hope for yourself, have faith in Him instead. God is hope Himself. He will never let you down. If you think He already did, think again. He's God and you're just a human, His child, you can only think limitedly (if that's a word) but God, He knows everything. He's already there while you still haven't arrived. He's already there while you haven't jumped. He already know the answers before you even have the question. This has turned into a preachy vibe letter but I just don't know what to tell you else if you have a problem but only God. Whatever problem that is. Okay now, to the opposite side of the page, assuming you're happy. Well congrats! And thank you, for being happy. Being happy is taking care of yourself. Although being sad does not mean you don't care about yourself, I simply mean thank you for choosing to be happy and taking care of yourself at the same time. Continue to feel blessed and to be a blessing to others as well. God is with you all throughout your life. Don't forget to be grateful and never ever lose your faith. Now I have a question, what are your plans? Did my question scare you? I hope not. Did your plans change? Or did you stick to what your past self planned for you? That's me, to you. I mean we're the same person just not the same timeline. Now I'm wondering, what if this was sent in the wrong time? Like backwards? Alright that's another topic. (I feel like this would remind you how messy and random your past self thinks.) Well, I won't talk about your future too much because bro I'm already talking to you which is my future so talk to your own future because you're also the past of your future. Did you get it? We all are the past and future of our future and past. I feel sleepy. Oh I don't want to cut it here but even if I'm 16 now, I'm still a child and I love sleep. I hope this letter finds you well, alive and happy. If you're curious about how I was today if you can't remember it anymore, then that's your problem. Go look for your old twitter account and reminisce. Duh? Charrot. I'll tell you some other time. It's not like I didn't tell you about it in my previous letters (which I'm not sure if you received). But I'll tell you about it next time, seriously. Maybe I'll just write a letter again but the setting of delivery would be a year from now. Fair? You don't have a say so fair. Lastly, if you have a boyfriend now--WHY. Char. I wouldn't know so I'll just hope he passed our non-negotiables and negotiables list. Love you.