A letter from Oct 26th, 2021

Dear me, Life is hard for you right now, I know how much you're suffering, obviously because you're me. So much in your life is changing rapidly, and I just want to stop it all from slipping away. I have good, kind friends in real life (although in truth I don't like a couple of them), and I have the best friends anyone could ask for online (**** smirk orange! I don't know whether you'll still be friends with them by the time you get this email, if it even sends. I really hope you are, they're the best friends you've ever had, especially Corey). The main thing I want to ask you about is where you are in your transition. As of right now I'm planning to come out and start physically transitioning after I finish sixth form. I will be 18 and able to go down to London to the gender clinic, and able to legally change my name. Everything is so scary and overwhelming, but I think if I don't do it I will end up ******* myself, because I'm miserable with myself. If I can't live as a man like I was supposed to there is no point in living at all. So if everything worked out as planned, you should have already lived about 2 years ? as a man! I really hope so. Don't you dare chicken out! Another thing I want to ask about is autism. Have you got professionally diagnosed yet? I'm really struggling with school at the moment, taking so many days off, waiting for a diagnosis for autism, depression and anxiety. I really don't think life was cut out for me, but I'm trying my hardest to get through. I know everything will be ok one day. Are you still obsessed with Metal Gear Solid? Got any cool MGS merch? What about Doctor Who? I can't wait to eventually meet Kieran one day. It's one of the things I look forward to the most. Anyways, I think that's it. Love you so much, I hope you're doing well. Me , nearly 16 years old xD