A letter from Oct 5th, 2021

Dear FutureMe, I show up to school because I would like more knowledge. I love to learn and it gives me something to do. I get really bored and this is an easy escape for me while being productive. I initially came to CSUN for acting opportunities. Since I am not on campus it is hard for me to participate in Theatre and or acting opportunities. While I have not been very diligent in keeping in contact with my community in Theatre. I would love to and I want to but I get scared and nervous. I doubt myself. In a way I feel like I need to do it. Like it will haunt me if I don't use my skill to their full potential. I think I cheated myself in school. I know I am smart and I know I can learn. But me not trying I sold myself short on a lot of time and information. Do I regret it? Kind of but it's okay because I can manage and make up or try hard now. Not that I am putting all my effort into this class or any of my other classes. I am not putting in 150% which is what I would like to do but for now me just getting my work done feels like I am doing enough. This is the point where I need to not get comfortable and make my dreams come true and get this great education that is easily accessible to me. I hope to be acting in 5 years I hope to be graduated from college and in a studio apartment in L.A. or close by. I hope to be working on movies that change cinema. I want to be a star. I want to be somebody. I want to reach into people's lives and create joy, connection and an escape from reality or a different angle of reality. I am close to being myself I am getting there and sometimes I lose it but that is when I am stagnant and getting comfortable. I need to keep moving. As a man and as a person if I am to reach my goals which are unspoken and unrealistic but I can try. I want to be someone people look up to someone people admire because I want to be. Being the best influence I can while reaching out to children and not just adults but changing future generations and the way they think and operate. I want goodness for the world Prosperity and a great world for everyone to live in. Although my reality will-be completely different from reality to everyone else.