A letter from Oct 2nd, 2021

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, I am so proud of you at how far you have come in the last 10 years. From where you were at the age of 20. Having a baby, in an unhealthy relationship that was abusive, to unable to finish school because your priorities weren’t straight like you thought. To a lot of partying and living. You made a lot of great memories but hid a lot of pain. Right before turning 30 you wanted a healthier version of you. You took your mental health serious and put in work for yourself. Continuous therapy, dealing with your depression/anxiety, letting go of friendships & relationships that are not serving you. Creating an atmosphere that is healthy for you and your babies. Being more present for your babies. For your 30’s you have set the Intentions of peace, love, and happiness. To be a better version of yourself. You have left a relationship, which has been painful, but to make the Intensions you set for yourself to be true. You have realized life is too short to be Unhappy. & all through your 20’s you were Unhappy. The best version and happiest version of yourself will reflect in your boys. They too will be the best versions of themselves. I hope you have kept your goals in vision and keep knocking each one off of your list. Because you are capable of anything you set your mind too. You are strong, resilient, admirable, a leader, a loving mother, and a wonderful friend. Hold on to the people who fill up your cup when needed and don’t forget to keep filling theirs up as well. 💜 Love always, Me. You have grown so much from 20 until 30. Keep growing & glowing!

Epilogue

over 3 years later

Dear Me,

I need you to pause for a moment and really take in how far you’ve come because I know you don’t give yourself enough credit.

Life didn’t get...

Klie oudlw oecn aicllymag yuo ehdpo ti riesae. Ni in rviheae c,fat yman ys,wa got it. Oldu adn ntiloomea tsom atth ’dotn poleep lkta oeyvu’ ,cooisfunn ndik of hiewgt hreakrabt,e ebsc,atks out uatob reciadr the. Aer dna uyo lsitl eyt rhee. Gnrity stlil. Ttb,ree even henw ti ohgocins sltil tshur.
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You atilubeuf eifv nhtaeor spta eth efli syera, tino butohgr stih wlrod ni. Yuo of now eomhrt a ereht are. Ehert to kool augcined nda uoy owh for tltlei feytas, hmunas elvo,. Orme vgigin anht omse edtispe ouy elef era d,say ouy tmeh owh yuo eiarelz.
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- iienbcerld ddi edagrudta uoy ouy timohensg. 5202, hwta oenc nihifsde oyu tlfe eospimibsl ni. You uyo of to ni wae ryaes stpo ohw she hda be ivhgtenyre a?go noeisrv fo uwodl ttha wno.
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Yepdl,e teh cbka haert ni hsa nbee a aedm uyo gotuhh levae pasnlihoiret atth ofrht veen to ruoy ueldpl oyu dan adn detset nigaa ahs ochcie. Ssawkene ttah an’stw a. Swa ertthsng a htta. Hgtwor ttha aws. Egryfrniti yosferlu, uoy earctnuin etfl ewhn neev saw that ihcngsoo and it.
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Lsot i lefe uoy wokn hrgti own.
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Sa ’oyure and hvyae, ont enorsiv fo uoy orf uryo pu sidk eelf foyerslu i ghsnwoi oknw tesb ,isedatol het kile. Goenirtv-h ustj eerf apphy, ldcou nkow that epnpah ,hwloe lcdou up yuo awek hiws you i dna nihlega and eelf.
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Wrkos htt’as btu not tihs woh. Nda fliagin ’ureyo nema ttah tens’od.
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Ta oen not abck raseuq you rea.
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Won who osmonee ahs oolts era uyo. Awarsesen. Reecnepiex. Obsniaduer. Enev pnosie,drse yeth uodl ouy yudpt—os yntxea,i ydillnb tirhg goecirzne ehtm yruo on,eyamr oyur elfe uyor onw by not fi ryuo inebg ldteolcorn ear ,doc naiga.
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A sthirgat otn lgeinah si enil. ’its seysm. Lsoop ti. It uassep. Ti starrtse. Dan oyu ntveah’ smtomiese selef riev,eghnyt ubt klei ti e’vyuo nnedou.
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Yuo ncoe stlil that trosng, erotw inseelirt era mawno uyo tobua.
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Now tath naht yeoru’ tul,cayal oerm.
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Ongig dan prata fsele uabcees wno ahwt onkw ti ot lfal tisll uyo ekli kpee.
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Epcla ,rthut a oyu nto rea rmof fo vrivulas drleuiibgn life rouy.
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Aldelwo to ekat oryu uyo etmi era.
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Fele smae het nad oyu ads eitm rea to at adwleol lpouhef.
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Ouy out to laoelwd riugfde are lal ton eyt aehv it.
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Si thaw it:hs stremat.
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Rtigny are ouy.
Ghnisoco ear tbreet ouy.
You here aer llist.
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Ot ahtt fo egosmitnh si be dna udrop.
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Rctfpee dksi royu nto’d yuo of a evrsion need.
One a dnee real yhet.
A lhianeg oen.
Noe a nwogirg.
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Ttah nda rea yuo woh cyxlaet is.
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Eepk oggin.
Nvee no eth syda qteui.
Vene ayveh on sday eth.
Erpgossr wnhe mkgina fele y’reuo eikl vnee yuo ton.
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Cuesbae uoy rea.
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Fo mchu oen you rdenvoa— u,onnwnk nad in so kloo one ,yad lilw yorsulfe -the seorvin sthi ckab ouy efle agtnsirt oospciasnm epdri tingist het at lwli.
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Era ont yuo olst.
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Hte ddleim ni rae cobimeng ouy of.
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Eol,v twih.
Me 💜.

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