A letter from Oct 2nd, 2021

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, I am so proud of you at how far you have come in the last 10 years. From where you were at the age of 20. Having a baby, in an unhealthy relationship that was abusive, to unable to finish school because your priorities weren’t straight like you thought. To a lot of partying and living. You made a lot of great memories but hid a lot of pain. Right before turning 30 you wanted a healthier version of you. You took your mental health serious and put in work for yourself. Continuous therapy, dealing with your depression/anxiety, letting go of friendships & relationships that are not serving you. Creating an atmosphere that is healthy for you and your babies. Being more present for your babies. For your 30’s you have set the Intentions of peace, love, and happiness. To be a better version of yourself. You have left a relationship, which has been painful, but to make the Intensions you set for yourself to be true. You have realized life is too short to be Unhappy. & all through your 20’s you were Unhappy. The best version and happiest version of yourself will reflect in your boys. They too will be the best versions of themselves. I hope you have kept your goals in vision and keep knocking each one off of your list. Because you are capable of anything you set your mind too. You are strong, resilient, admirable, a leader, a loving mother, and a wonderful friend. Hold on to the people who fill up your cup when needed and don’t forget to keep filling theirs up as well. 💜 Love always, Me. You have grown so much from 20 until 30. Keep growing & glowing!

Epilogue

over 3 years later

Dear Me,

I need you to pause for a moment and really take in how far you’ve come because I know you don’t give yourself enough credit.

Life didn’t get...

Dpeho ouy seeari wdulo ekli neco llaiamcyg it. Mayn vreheia tcfa, sa,wy in in it got. ,bkstcaes ot’dn doul and takl lepope dnik raet,arbhek fnsocn,iou tehiwg atth mioleanot fo otms touba rriecad yeo’uv the tou. And eyt rea slilt ouy eher. Ltlsi yrntgi. Veen enwh tetr,be isllt ti trshu sgcnoioh.
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Alufeuibt ysrea, teh yuo taps uhgrbot lief wrlod inot isht ifev in rohanet. Rea of reteh a emotrh yuo nwo. Ereth how and to ltilet you ,olve kloo icandegu y,aetfs for musnha. Mseo rlezeai sday, ouy hwo igivng uoy era tmhe iseetpd efle yuo emro anht.
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- hnogtsmie did you uyo etadgurda idieeclrnb. Sbilsiepmo ni infsidhe yuo tfel 5,022 onec htaw. Dha tath of seayr heytenrgiv ago? ouy ohw rsonive ot lwduo eb hes wno fo pots ni wae uyo.
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A ietslhpionar haert hociec hte dame ,elpdye and bnee uyo sah yruo ni aangi evne ot ahs atht ouy sedett uhhogt bcka nad aleev fohtr llpdeu. A ahtt nsa’tw ankwsees. Hsgtrnte aws ahtt a. Htat hwtrog wsa. Nvee flet uyo adn uolyerfs, erinfrgtiy ti ehnw cogsnoih cnirnauet wsa htat.
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Oyu wno elef rthgi slto onkw i.
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As rof not fo ihgwsno nda yuo kdis onwk et,idsola eoury’ tesb yuor i ,aveyh up klie eforlyus lefe het sevniro. Npahep ihws fele nad ouldc ldcou awek hel,ow yuo onwk elgniha free uyo tjus that pu ghvniro-et and ypah,p i.
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How tno owrks t’asth htsi btu. Adn uoery’ n’odset flniiga taht eman.
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Cakb era ouy otn eon rquaes ta.
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Ohw soeeomn ouy now lsoto hsa aer. Snaaeeswr. Xnreepecei. Rbnesiouad. Naiag emrona,y ulod by oyu do,c blindyl oury now lfee uroy esnispeo,rd nto meht trnlcodole xen,aiyt evne ognezecri fi ypd—tuso yuor hyte aer nbeig uory hitgr.
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Anghlie a einl aihtrgts si ton. Ti’s yemss. It posol. Aepssu it. It attersrs. Eeslf tbu ti re,vtgyihne uyo vntha’e evyou’ dan ekil emesistom ounend.
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Neco era steeirinl lslti oyu uyo owamn s,rngto taht worte tuabo.
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Alta,cluy ahtt orme reyuo’ nwo nhta.
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Tllis elefs own lfal it ikel parta twha epke iggno nad bceuaes ot yuo onwk.
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Rae rusvvail fo ilef yuor alcpe a oyu not h,uttr driunlgieb mrfo.
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Ot eloldaw are eimt ruyo keta oyu.
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Ads ot dna you uoplfeh elfe miet at dloealw rae eth smea.
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Uto yte ot otn dwloeal rae ufegidr lla uyo evah ti.
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Is s:tih awht rteasmt.
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Irgnyt aer uoy.
Eettrb uoy aer ocgiohns.
Rea lltsi uyo reeh.
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Ot rpoud is thta nhtmoiesg of eb dna.
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Uoyr ikds a vesrion of d’not eden you eecfptr.
Erla eon eyth a dnee.
A lnaeihg eon.
Ronwggi a neo.
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Owh ear nad is yuo xcatley htat.
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Peke gogin.
Enev the ysda on qeiut.
Ydas nvee eayhv teh on.
Ont rspserog yroeu’ uoy lkei efel enve enwh ikagmn.
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Eeascbu ouy rea.
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One at ayd, hsti n,knwnuo yuo noe gtnitis acispsmono lfyrsueo os te-h back ipred ni mcuh kool nda aigrntts nrvsoie fo ouy the lfee redvoan— lwil ilwl.
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Slto aer not ouy.
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In becigomn the oyu rea mddlie fo.
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Vo,le whit.
💜 em.

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