A letter from Oct 2nd, 2021

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, I am so proud of you at how far you have come in the last 10 years. From where you were at the age of 20. Having a baby, in an unhealthy relationship that was abusive, to unable to finish school because your priorities weren’t straight like you thought. To a lot of partying and living. You made a lot of great memories but hid a lot of pain. Right before turning 30 you wanted a healthier version of you. You took your mental health serious and put in work for yourself. Continuous therapy, dealing with your depression/anxiety, letting go of friendships & relationships that are not serving you. Creating an atmosphere that is healthy for you and your babies. Being more present for your babies. For your 30’s you have set the Intentions of peace, love, and happiness. To be a better version of yourself. You have left a relationship, which has been painful, but to make the Intensions you set for yourself to be true. You have realized life is too short to be Unhappy. & all through your 20’s you were Unhappy. The best version and happiest version of yourself will reflect in your boys. They too will be the best versions of themselves. I hope you have kept your goals in vision and keep knocking each one off of your list. Because you are capable of anything you set your mind too. You are strong, resilient, admirable, a leader, a loving mother, and a wonderful friend. Hold on to the people who fill up your cup when needed and don’t forget to keep filling theirs up as well. 💜 Love always, Me. You have grown so much from 20 until 30. Keep growing & glowing!

Epilogue

over 3 years later

Dear Me,

I need you to pause for a moment and really take in how far you’ve come because I know you don’t give yourself enough credit.

Life didn’t get...

Onec cmaayillg rseaei oyu ilek ouldw ephod ti. Ni ni aynm tf,ac ay,sw otg it raevhei. Ton’d ats,kbces dink atth iewtgh ktal rcairde fo dluo het otu ficonsuno, smot nda boatu ,bhaerekatr opelpe nloiotema evuo’y. Ltsil dan you ety aer erhe. Ryntig stlli. Trhus ti nvee ghociosn sillt nhwe ebet,rt.
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Tshi uoy esy,ar ilef ehtnaro sapt bhgrtou atbefiulu ifve inot teh lrodw ni. Erhte rhoetm won uyo a of rae. Ofr dan dgeuacin loko fay,est ot how eo,vl ansmhu teher itltle uoy. Ear zialree nviigg oyu mthe rome mseo yuo how thna psdiete oyu ,sday elef.
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Uoy audgdraet leiinbcder ouy egmnshiot - ddi. Ni idfienhs 2,205 sspiobelmi ceno uoy ftle hwta. Who oyu uoldw be ahd g?oa in to fo oyu sryae hneeigvtry onw opst hes awe of atth eroivns.
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Daem ttdese hatt ldpule eth adn eed,lyp tiaslpoirneh enev a ofrht hhugot in bene cecohi hsa ruoy to ckba has ainga ouy uyo eleva haert dan. Ssanweke snw’at hatt a. Ttah a hsetgrnt swa. Swa htat gwothr. Lfet ttah ieifrrnygt adn even it nweh oyu eurnancti saw gohoscin oysufrel,.
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Won elfe oslt wokn uyo hrtig i.
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The hgiswno hy,ave uoy ownk sa efle up keli kdsi eu’roy fo stbe i i,aletdos for rlsuefoy your adn reonisv not. Ishw i erfe eawk oyu hatt up leef tujs dcolu onwk ucdol yuo dna apneph vgteroh-ni nhgaiel adn phy,ap ehwol,.
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Sith ’ttsah btu who nto kwors. Gaiflni ueoyr’ and htta den’tso aemn.
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Era ton one ouy ta requas ckab.
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Onw ear who you sah tloos seemnoo. Snaresaew. Icereneexp. Dbnaiuoser. By ydsou—tp aytien,x nwo ryoamen, vnee hgrit tencodrlol idylnlb ruoy aer ton oryu lefe grzeeoinc ,ipnsrseoed yuo ibnge htey ocd, yuor dluo fi yoru ethm aaing.
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Enil is nleigah agrsttih not a. Ymsse is’t. Olosp ti. Ti puasse. It rassettr. Ouy gnerthyeiv, esmmsetio btu elik nouned ti uyoe’v aeh’tnv dna lseef.
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Enco reilnesit woert lslti uoy bouat omnaw atht yuo gns,tor rea.
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Anth ahtt eomr a,yclatul wno r’yeou.
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To flal lseef eepk dan onkw won ouy ltsil ignog ti artap ucsaeeb wtah ilke.
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Omrf aelcp drubgneili otn ilfe yrou a isvrluav uoy fo rae h,ttru.
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Emit uyo eatk aer royu olwdela ot.
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Lefe wdleloa efhlupo ot smea uoy asd rea eimt hte and ta.
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Ot otn ouy rea yte heva all tuo wdaolle it girfued.
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Is:th si awht etsatmr.
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Tirnyg yuo are.
Hiongcos uoy ebrett rae.
Aer lltis oyu reeh.
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Fo ot and is opudr hnoiegtms taht eb.
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Ksid yuo a ceretfp ivornes ’todn fo yuro edne.
A eon dnee yeth rlea.
Eaiglnh a eno.
A oen rgnwoig.
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Dan ohw oyu ear ttha is clxyeat.
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Ginog pkee.
No ysda queti evne het.
The enve sday aehyv no.
Gkanmi iekl yeo’ur leef nto ersogpsr wnhe neve oyu.
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Ouy era acueesb.
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The yad, prdie iwll -the nda noe snoicsmopa uoy ackb rtasntig ni osrufely ouy of efel liwl this much onnkw,nu so doan—rev ookl ntitgsi snorvie eon at.
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Solt uyo rae otn.
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Idmled era ni of eth gomcbien yuo.
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,evlo ithw.
💜 em.

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