A letter from Oct 2nd, 2021

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, I am so proud of you at how far you have come in the last 10 years. From where you were at the age of 20. Having a baby, in an unhealthy relationship that was abusive, to unable to finish school because your priorities weren’t straight like you thought. To a lot of partying and living. You made a lot of great memories but hid a lot of pain. Right before turning 30 you wanted a healthier version of you. You took your mental health serious and put in work for yourself. Continuous therapy, dealing with your depression/anxiety, letting go of friendships & relationships that are not serving you. Creating an atmosphere that is healthy for you and your babies. Being more present for your babies. For your 30’s you have set the Intentions of peace, love, and happiness. To be a better version of yourself. You have left a relationship, which has been painful, but to make the Intensions you set for yourself to be true. You have realized life is too short to be Unhappy. & all through your 20’s you were Unhappy. The best version and happiest version of yourself will reflect in your boys. They too will be the best versions of themselves. I hope you have kept your goals in vision and keep knocking each one off of your list. Because you are capable of anything you set your mind too. You are strong, resilient, admirable, a leader, a loving mother, and a wonderful friend. Hold on to the people who fill up your cup when needed and don’t forget to keep filling theirs up as well. 💜 Love always, Me. You have grown so much from 20 until 30. Keep growing & glowing!

Epilogue

over 3 years later

Dear Me,

I need you to pause for a moment and really take in how far you’ve come because I know you don’t give yourself enough credit.

Life didn’t get...

It areies dhoep eocn uoy elik aicalmygl wuold. ,aftc yman gto in ni a,wsy it areevhi. Otabu k,atscbes dan nkdi ond’t iraedrc eth atlk tou uevy’o fo opepel that us,ofnoicn udol otoeianlm ethigw eaartr,ehbk mtso. Rea still ety nda reeh oyu. Lltis nrtigy. Iohngcos tbt,ere even it nhwe sllti uhtrs.
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Oenraht ,rysae nito ftiueubla ilef hgubort evif hsit ouy the apst lwdor in. Uoy a ehtre htemro aer onw of. Eilttl ofr oe,lv and oolk amnuhs setyf,a how to ouy reeht cdnieaug. Oyu nhta ethm emro ggivni ouy relzaie uyo eeitsdp sa,yd lefe ohw eosm aer.
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Oyu - uoy bicnerledi idd htsimgeon etgaddaur. Ouy htaw ftel 502,2 iobesspilm ncoe ni fnhisedi. Fo ohw adh igthyeevrn yarse ewa fo uyo yuo ni g?oa siovnre eb own opst ldowu taht to esh.
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Ot ahtt lludpe kbca a teh ohfrt evne uroy ni velae dylpee, adn hsa erhat adn naiag you uoy toghhu ahs ioasiephrlnt eadm eenb ohcice tdstee. Htat a t’nwsa knaesswe. Etrgnths aws atht a. Wsa thta gwhtor. Inurnceta hogcniso you enrtiygirf neve ttah and ofle,uysr aws tlfe ti ewnh.
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Leef hgtri i ouy nkow lost onw.
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Nad sulreyfo snovire yruo otn eth iaotle,sd wnok oyu stbe i sa orf eelf pu elki ueyor’ kids wignohs fo ha,evy. Eelf rfee p,yhpa oulcd adn penpha onkw uoy pu kwae eg-hritnov nad wshi oyu aelngih htat e,lhwo tujs i dcuol.
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Okwsr h’atts utb isht who tno. Tne’dso gianfli e’oruy tath nda nema.
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Era uyo tno eon ta aesurq kbca.
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Mesoeon how yuo nwo rea toslo sha. Anwarssee. Exercpeine. Neubodirsa. If necrizeog olud oyru yhet lfee era ylbdinl grhit emth p—usdoty nesid,psroe uoy mn,reaoy ,odc benig vnee oyru yuor e,axynti ruoy otn by enoldctolr gaian nwo.
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A gthiatsr gialneh is ieln tno. Sit’ ysmse. Ti slopo. Ti esaspu. It rtsserat. It tbu dan mitesoesm sfeel yeo’uv uoy lkie dnnueo ,etevrhnyig tev’anh.
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Istll boaut you enco rea ouy taht risiletne wrteo otgsr,n oanmw.
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Wno ntha oeu’ry taht tlca,lyau orem.
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Ot gnogi ti onw keli ekpe htwa wnok lefse lafl itsll and aptra eacseub ouy.
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Tu,rht fo era efli a apelc uvlrivas not idugirebln you oyur fomr.
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Oyur are meit daelwol yuo teka to.
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Rea dlawoel ta oyu ads uehlopf teim aesm ot dan eefl eth.
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Not ot oyu fergdiu ti yet uot aer deloalw lla avhe.
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Hatw tseatrm si sthi:.
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Yuo rae yigrtn.
Gsnooich erebtt oyu ear.
Eerh aer you lslit.
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Hesitnmgo si that of dna to dpruo be.
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A need yuo ivsrone yoru retfecp kisd odt’n fo.
Ende oen aelr yeht a.
One a ieanhgl.
A gnrgiow neo.
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How is uyo eatylxc rae and ahtt.
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Gnogi kepe.
On eenv eht ysad utieq.
Eht no enev vhyea ayds.
Lkei evne ont rergposs uyo euoyr’ akingm wneh lefe.
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Ear you abeescu.
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Dvno—rae teh t-he uyo so ipedr oyu y,ad elef onrvsie fryluose asntirgt of itinstg asposocinm bakc in will noe ta cmuh liwl w,nunonk dna one tsih olko.
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Ton uoy era lost.
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Fo ouy in rae bnegcmoi ieddml het.
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L,evo ihtw.
Me 💜.

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