A letter from Oct 2nd, 2021

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, I am so proud of you at how far you have come in the last 10 years. From where you were at the age of 20. Having a baby, in an unhealthy relationship that was abusive, to unable to finish school because your priorities weren’t straight like you thought. To a lot of partying and living. You made a lot of great memories but hid a lot of pain. Right before turning 30 you wanted a healthier version of you. You took your mental health serious and put in work for yourself. Continuous therapy, dealing with your depression/anxiety, letting go of friendships & relationships that are not serving you. Creating an atmosphere that is healthy for you and your babies. Being more present for your babies. For your 30’s you have set the Intentions of peace, love, and happiness. To be a better version of yourself. You have left a relationship, which has been painful, but to make the Intensions you set for yourself to be true. You have realized life is too short to be Unhappy. & all through your 20’s you were Unhappy. The best version and happiest version of yourself will reflect in your boys. They too will be the best versions of themselves. I hope you have kept your goals in vision and keep knocking each one off of your list. Because you are capable of anything you set your mind too. You are strong, resilient, admirable, a leader, a loving mother, and a wonderful friend. Hold on to the people who fill up your cup when needed and don’t forget to keep filling theirs up as well. 💜 Love always, Me. You have grown so much from 20 until 30. Keep growing & glowing!

Epilogue

over 3 years later

Dear Me,

I need you to pause for a moment and really take in how far you’ve come because I know you don’t give yourself enough credit.

Life didn’t get...

Nceo would ti dpheo laylamicg uoy aseeir eikl. Erahvei ti in tog mayn ta,fc in ,sawy. Lamotonei ratbh,raeek ktla ckssb,tae ye’ovu uldo incnfous,o uot nkdi lpepoe fo toms decrria and htat wiehgt tbauo d’ton eth. Rea ehre you lltis dan ety. Itnygr tsill. Onhcsgoi still surht it veen trbtee, hnew.
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Sa,rey in yuo nito life eivf psta brhogut beuitlafu rnohaet siht the ordwl. Of uoy trehe aer a nwo troehm. Asmunh heert ot nuidecag ookl uyo who ofr ttelli lv,oe teyfsa, dan. Atnh era aerilez ouy mroe dtipsee uyo msoe iniggv hemt efle ,sdya you woh.
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Uoy tiehsmgno gdrauedat idd - bneilriedc yuo. Oyu in awht ssebimplio fidsehni flet ncoe 20,52. Ni og?a oyu how fo otsp eivneyghrt dah eb that of wdoul she yuo irovens onw to aew asrye.
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Sialhitrpeon sah acbk eamd dna vnee reaht and aniag yuo has esdtte oyu eth a avele hicoce ni ot ryou dpllue ohrft taht been ugothh ,ylpede. Htat swsaenke a stw’an. Atht a htergtns was. Oghwrt asw ttha. Ahtt veen swa fetl hnew sgcnohio ti nad aceninutr uoy irtfineygr ,ysuloefr.
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Ouy onw flee nkwo ightr slto i.
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I orf solfruey ebts kwno fo ,yahve klei inwshgo sa ioda,stle ureo’y oury eelf idks pu nviores nad not uyo teh. Eaghnil efre ludco kewa iergotnv-h oyu dna ppneha yuo elfe ttah could pu sjtu i okwn nda hwis olhw,e ahp,yp.
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This wrkso hsta’t woh tub tno. Nda ttha iingalf sndtoe’ ’uroey mnea.
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Oen uoy abck qasreu otn era at.
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Uoy era nwo omoense sah owh stool. Srawneaes. Rxeicenepe. Eusadrbino. Oc,d uory ziegcrone etyh not fi gbeni iaagn txniyea, by yoru yrou your efle mteh neev rmnyoe,a nwo psud—toy yuo rdsosei,epn doul oeclndorlt dillybn tgihr era.
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Tashtrig nlie is a lhgaeni nto. Emsys i’st. Ti osopl. Usspea ti. Rtsetasr ti. Haent’v sieomsemt ti hrgtne,veiy ouy eouyv’ sleef eodnun lkie tub nda.
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Ouy eseinrlti rtweo woamn n,strog itlsl uyo noce era tuabo taht.
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That wno rome yt,acuall ’yroue anth.
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Feesl bcesuea gnigo tlils lalf yuo it onw trpaa nad lkie waht to konw epke.
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Pecla era begurnliid ifle ont you mofr thurt, vrusialv ouyr a of.
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To owalled yuro era keat uyo imet.
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Emti uyo oleuhfp flee lledaow at het dan ear esam to ads.
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Ti lla to eoaldwl evha tou regfidu not yuo tey rea.
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Ettrsma htwa :shti si.
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Oyu tygnri rae.
Cinoshgo uoy ear eerbtt.
Ehre you are ltlis.
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Htat rodpu adn ot fo be igtsonehm is.
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’ndot need irnveso fo kdsi ouy yuro rfteepc a.
Oen thye eden lare a.
Gniheal noe a.
A neo noriwgg.
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Are nad si you owh xtyelca thta.
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Eekp inogg.
No enev uitqe eth yads.
Neev no ayehv eth sday.
Klie ont gaknim nvee yuo efel errgpsso nehw ’eruoy.
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You rae ebcsaue.
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Nuw,knno uoy of llwi in dan evnardo— uchm uyo okol tgsniit eno the trasintg elfe ackb -hte illw moiassnocp eprdi rosvnei at neo stih os dy,a luorsefy.
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Yuo not tols era.
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You mdiedl teh ni of eiogcmnb ear.
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L,veo htwi.
Me 💜.

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