A letter from Oct 2nd, 2021

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, I am so proud of you at how far you have come in the last 10 years. From where you were at the age of 20. Having a baby, in an unhealthy relationship that was abusive, to unable to finish school because your priorities weren’t straight like you thought. To a lot of partying and living. You made a lot of great memories but hid a lot of pain. Right before turning 30 you wanted a healthier version of you. You took your mental health serious and put in work for yourself. Continuous therapy, dealing with your depression/anxiety, letting go of friendships & relationships that are not serving you. Creating an atmosphere that is healthy for you and your babies. Being more present for your babies. For your 30’s you have set the Intentions of peace, love, and happiness. To be a better version of yourself. You have left a relationship, which has been painful, but to make the Intensions you set for yourself to be true. You have realized life is too short to be Unhappy. & all through your 20’s you were Unhappy. The best version and happiest version of yourself will reflect in your boys. They too will be the best versions of themselves. I hope you have kept your goals in vision and keep knocking each one off of your list. Because you are capable of anything you set your mind too. You are strong, resilient, admirable, a leader, a loving mother, and a wonderful friend. Hold on to the people who fill up your cup when needed and don’t forget to keep filling theirs up as well. 💜 Love always, Me. You have grown so much from 20 until 30. Keep growing & glowing!

Epilogue

over 3 years later

Dear Me,

I need you to pause for a moment and really take in how far you’ve come because I know you don’t give yourself enough credit.

Life didn’t get...

Uoy dulow iserae kiel liaalymcg hdoep ocne it. In got ti t,fca myan vaeehir ,sawy ni. Eht ekarbt,hrea geiwth tkla opeelp ,osunnocfi mtnieaolo otsm uold out ndt’o and ouyve’ tb,aesksc ttah kind of drireac taobu. Ehre rea dan uoy sitll yte. Nrigty illst. Listl erebt,t wehn neev uhrts it hgsonoic.
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Aiuutbfle iton shit eontrah ugrothb astp life in a,resy hte eifv you lrodw. Nwo ehtomr fo ereht a ouy rea. Ohw itltel dan htere lv,eo acuidegn e,fsyat unsahm ot loko orf uyo. Atnh lzireea osem oemr eistedp elfe ,yasd are ginivg yuo oyu uyo who emth.
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- uoy yuo tadgraude idd ncleeirdib mghstineo. Ni what uyo dhfiiens 20,25 ltfe piismbsloe cnoe. Now nsorevi oyu in hes fo opts aog? of you yrsae taht eb intvrheyeg to ulodw hwo eaw dah.
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Neev tsedte cceoih sha taht sha erhat nad bene yuo ot ckab nad ee,ypdl dleulp a eeavl maed eth uoy htloneaiipsr hotuhg ngaia in rohtf uroy. Atht saeekwns wns’ta a. Ttah swa rsgtethn a. Ttha trhogw aws. Uefslyro, enve nad ttha fgiirtnyer uyo ti wehn utincearn ingchoso was ftel.
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Oyu nwo lots i eefl rtihg nkow.
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Sa euyr’o steb dna ,seoidlta kids hte flee fo like wnko senrvio oyu up uory hisgnow i ont rof eyhva, felusyor. Wihs up rfee i owkn doluc lduco uoy akwe uoy hatt stju nad nda eefl y,ppha epanph no-thvrgie leow,h ighalne.
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Ubt hits owh ’tsaht oskrw ton. Finalgi uoye’r enam htat dna d’nteso.
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Eon ta ouy ear quarse kcab nto.
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Has ouy oslot nwo are noemoes hwo. Renawssae. Incxeeerpe. Roeubsaidn. Bieng not gtrih amyrneo, you yospt—du exyni,at uyor now vnee yuro ethm lcrootdnle are oi,esepsrdn fi lefe oury uory cod, doul gaain teyh cgoezenir yb nldlbiy.
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Nlie tahgrist tno a ghineal si. Symes is’t. It solop. Sepsua it. Attsserr ti. But kile vo’euy nndeou gvteren,ihy smteisome eeslf nda enha’tv it uyo.
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Neltiersi oautb ouy gon,str aer oecn tslil yuo ttah nmaow trwoe.
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Oerm atnh hatt won tucal,lay ’reuoy.
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Peke won ptaar tllis uoy ggino and twha it kiel lafl sefel to kown cbseuea.
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Pcela lief udnebgriil a ouy lvsvuria ear hrtu,t uroy fmro nto fo.
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Ryuo emit take wlleoda ot uyo rae.
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Seam mite at nad ouy ledlawo eth sda to leef puolhfe era.
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Yuo vhae eridguf otn all tuo ti yte oelladw ear ot.
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:shti ttersma ahtw si.
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Gyinrt oyu are.
Ebtret cinoohsg yuo rae.
Uoy rea erhe itlls.
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And ot si eb fo atth gothnsemi odurp.
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Ecerptf ouy oivsenr eden dsik a ruyo ton’d of.
Lrae dene yhte eon a.
Oen a aingelh.
A neo grgnoiw.
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Is htta acteylx nad rea hwo ouy.
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Ogngi eepk.
Qtuie even hte yads no.
On vene eht hevay days.
Nto yuo minagk newh vnee our’ye ikel sorsgpre fele.
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Seuabce oyu ear.
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Fele eon os tsingti shit teh loko eno in uoy psasmonico a,yd ta gtnistra uyfeorls wlil preid oyu dvreoa—n dan mhcu nwnonku, osvrnei akbc fo h-et illw.
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Era not yuo tslo.
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Ni icnomegb fo dlidme eth uyo are.
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Hwit le,ov.
💜 em.

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