A letter from Oct 2nd, 2021

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, I am so proud of you at how far you have come in the last 10 years. From where you were at the age of 20. Having a baby, in an unhealthy relationship that was abusive, to unable to finish school because your priorities weren’t straight like you thought. To a lot of partying and living. You made a lot of great memories but hid a lot of pain. Right before turning 30 you wanted a healthier version of you. You took your mental health serious and put in work for yourself. Continuous therapy, dealing with your depression/anxiety, letting go of friendships & relationships that are not serving you. Creating an atmosphere that is healthy for you and your babies. Being more present for your babies. For your 30’s you have set the Intentions of peace, love, and happiness. To be a better version of yourself. You have left a relationship, which has been painful, but to make the Intensions you set for yourself to be true. You have realized life is too short to be Unhappy. & all through your 20’s you were Unhappy. The best version and happiest version of yourself will reflect in your boys. They too will be the best versions of themselves. I hope you have kept your goals in vision and keep knocking each one off of your list. Because you are capable of anything you set your mind too. You are strong, resilient, admirable, a leader, a loving mother, and a wonderful friend. Hold on to the people who fill up your cup when needed and don’t forget to keep filling theirs up as well. 💜 Love always, Me. You have grown so much from 20 until 30. Keep growing & glowing!

Epilogue

over 3 years later

Dear Me,

I need you to pause for a moment and really take in how far you’ve come because I know you don’t give yourself enough credit.

Life didn’t get...

Iarsee ti uodlw lalgcimay coen liek ouy pheod. It gto ni rahieev caf,t namy ni ,yaws. Ab,estcsk tmso otmneiaol ,arkeaerhtb ewgtih reircda tou pploee unnos,foci oatbu kidn dolu dan hatt notd’ uv’yeo of hte atlk. Ltlsi era heer dan you yet. Ntryig itsll. Tslli nweh cooshing it eebrt,t nvee hstur.
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Sthi in tspa itueablfu lowrd uoy bhuogtr the atehrno lfei efvi ayse,r inot. Uoy a fo tehre rea roehmt won. Ahumns ttilel uyo yfes,at herte ookl nad who orf to ucedanig elov,. Aer you mteh lizreae oyu anth igvgin uyo mroe mseo ysad, eelf woh sietdpe.
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Oyu ddi ledniecbir you - dtrdeaaug sgtimheno. In elft yuo awth msbpisleoi deniifsh 0225, ceno. Fo now gheevyrnti oyu of uoy that hda spot asrye be in how eaw to o?ag esh seivnor oludw.
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Eetsdt choeci eldupl kbca a uothgh nda sha rfhto dl,ypee uroy in htta you to eht sha maed neev aveel ather dna lairpenotish ingaa oyu been. Neawessk htat w’ants a. A tath aws setthgnr. Ttah was thwrgo. Ignohcos wsa ttah enev uoy nda ntineucar eltf fs,eoruyl ti ehnw iytrrinefg.
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Otsl oyu feel now irhgt i ownk.
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Gnshwio btes yeo’ur as dksi kwon rsflyeuo pu ouy not leef kiel e,adsilto the i hvye,a ryou fro of sevnior adn. Aewk nda duocl kwon tnh-voergi efel i nda oyu atht hwis ha,pyp hpenap up eowl,h usjt eerf uyo geahiln loduc.
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Swork woh btu not iths tahts’. Nifgila ahtt n’dteos eman nda u’yeor.
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Quares bkca oen ta nto uoy aer.
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Rea uoy neemsoo sotol woh own ash. Wesenaras. Enecpeixre. Uaidorenbs. Ruoy ryea,mno e,snroedisp leef your by olndltoecr uoy noeezcrgi hmet aiyetxn, ethy bdliyln if tirhg pyoutd—s onw ,cod ear ton enev anaig dulo ginbe yruo ryuo.
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Tno si gtshatri a lnie nhaglei. Msesy ’ist. Lospo it. It easusp. Rsrattes ti. Sefle yuo elki it ubt ’evuoy nda igeretvyhn, vna’het oitsemems udnneo.
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Btoua you woter rtniseeli gt,onrs ahtt itlls yuo econ rae amnwo.
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Htat ye’oru meor ahnt wno ucytlal,a.
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Lalf caubsee you rtaap leik twha to ltlsi epek nda sfeel onw gogni wkno ti.
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A of era udlirginbe morf cplae ,truht leif iravvlsu nto ouy rouy.
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Ot emti elowlda ruyo ekta uyo rae.
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Msea dsa lhpeofu hte dna oellwda ear yuo elfe ot at miet.
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Tuo it vaeh ont era yuo to all dolwael yte ueifdgr.
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Is awth rtasetm tsih:.
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Yuo ear ntiryg.
Yuo hsngcooi terteb era.
Sllti uoy ear eerh.
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Ihegtnoms dna is eb of dopru to ahtt.
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Eden dont’ cpftree inserov a dksi uoy of ouyr.
One ende eral a teyh.
Lhginea noe a.
A eno wrggnio.
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Uyo who is aer exlycta that nda.
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Onggi keep.
Sady veen on eutqi the.
No aveyh eth syad eevn.
Oru’ye nto iekl eefl epssrrog uyo eenv nkmaig enwh.
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Ear escueab you.
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Shit eno ady, kolo llwi ansrtgit sgttini redip teh ta neovr—ad os cmhu fo oseinrv ouslyref and illw wkn,onun feel yuo eth- ni yuo one ackb acoinmsosp.
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Uoy otn stlo rae.
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Demidl teh imegcbno are ni of oyu.
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,lvoe hwti.
Em 💜.

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