A letter from September 22nd, 2021

Life is hard. That is a concept that I have had to become really familiar with recently. I remember being in my first year of middle school, hearing about how some kids struggled with depression or anxiety, and thinking: "wow, that could never be me!". Here's the thing: six years later, and that is me. Things have been hard lately. Grade 12 has been hard. Friendships and relationships have been hard. Life has been hard. Since November of 2020, I have felt broken inside. Of course, there are the few joyful moments here and there that reestablish hope. But overall, it has been a gruelling ten months. Between having my heart broken (and then stomped on further), Han being sick and dealing with a worldwide pandemic, I really don't see how things could possibly get worse. I haven't yet decided when I will be sending this letter. You are currently 16 (17 in 3 months yesterday!), in your final year of high school, and confused as ever as to what you want to do with your life. Maybe teaching? That's probably the most appealing option. Who knows, right? Life is hard. But it does have its ways of surprising you at the most random moments. Maybe one of these moments is just around the corner. If I had to pick three "magic" wishes for when you receive this, it would be the following: 1. You are at McGill or have been accepted there, studying what makes YOU passionate and happy (and not worrying about what anyone else thinks); 2. You are finally at peace with yourself; 3. You have learned not to take anything or anyone for granted. One last thing: if, by chance, you're in love, please don't repeat the same mistakes as last time. Prioritize yourself. Don't let anyone undermine your worth or treat you as if you don't matter. Get out early this time, before you start spiralling down a path of sadness and self-deprecation. The right person will see just how special you are. Yes, you are special. Life is hard. But I think it will get better. I hope it will get better. I think I am going to send this on your 21st birthday. Hopefully you still have this email :) Happy birthday, future me. I really do hope all of your - our - wishes come true.