A letter from Aug 25th, 2021

Hi, I don't know how will you be doing when you read this email, but today I learned that my low self esteem could have been because I didn't develop a good work and social ethics. Or even personal ethics. She probably was a privileged girl who thought that the world will move at a slow pace, an ideal pace according to her limited observation. Her observation was that limited because her privilege prevented her to observe more than she could ever observe. I have never seen a perseverance attitude from both of my parents. Probably because one will tell me the story when 'it is time' (e.g. when I struggle) and another one was due to her own work attitude. Self-denial, afraid to be the center of a topic, afraid to be the 'woman' that everyone gossiped about are the fundamentals of her attitude. I see similar attitude with her sisters. Maybe the common knowledge about privilege was right, it is a dual spear sword. It either relaxes you or it could lift you up. I think it is time to use what I already obtained as a tool to lift me up. August 2021.