A letter from Aug 21st, 2021

Peaceful right?

Dear FutureMe, I know this is going to go down badly for you if this is a no, but is covid stil a thing? I'm so done with it and it's so frustrating trying to find out more about it just to get a "we don't know yet".Context: delta variant's been here for a month or so and is ******* everything up, and Papa also got covid a week ago or so. Masks are still going to be on for this school year, but I think they're planning to take them off after a month? Sounds like a horrible plan, mainly because of the exagerated number of Karens who think "it's gonna change their DNA and make their already menopausal bodies infertile!!!". I think I'm just done with it all, I've gotten my hopes up so many times just to be disappointed in a matter of hours, or worse, I build up my expectations, and last minute, they cancel. I have way too many examples, it's just depressing. This is seriously going to give me trauma ahhaha. Also adding to the fact that not very social Mia has to be even less (yes it's possible) social, mainly when people are having unsafe parties and whatnot, so I just have to scroll through all those stories while in my bedroom eating chocolate to eat away the sadness. I tell myself that maybe if covid wasn't here, and I'd be able to go to a big party, I'd finally open my people circle, but let's be frank: I have not been invited to a multitude of parties, all of the parties I have been invited to (through friends of course, who would ever think of adding Mia to the group chat, unthinkable!) are filled of people I can't stand and well people in Switzerland are just not fun. Anyways, just reminding you that it's okay if you hate the Swiss, 'cause they suck, and if you had a lame junior year, it's normal 'cause your school sucks ***! ...Another tough question. How did the first partials go? I'm not really that worried 'cause they're all classes we're okay at, but I'm just checking in. Just a reminder: YOU ARE NOT NATHAN. It's okay if your test scores aren't as good as his! Honestly, I'd be really worried if they were... Also, if you did **** up, you can still catch up on the 2nd since they have more value (not sure how you're gonna do that but I believe in you, you can do anything if you put your mind to it!!) I guess that's it. Whenever times get tough, just remember: at least I'm not 15 year-old Mia, **** was she depressed! Nah jk, I mean it's not wrong but... If you're in a bad place, you're the only one with the key to leave the... place? What I'm trying to say is: you control your life, you choose if it's ****** and if it's not, I know it sucks to have this kind of responsibility, but having the ability to choose is liberating. Also! Good luck on uni applications! You got this! It's ok if you don't get into your #1 school, aka UCSB, there are a bunch of other great options. This Mia is absolute **** at essays, but I believe in you! Yes, you've worked hard enough, you've done a bunch of extracurricular and you're passionate, so I truly believe YOU GOT THIS! Don't forget to breathe. Mia

Epilogue

about 17 hours later

Hey PastMe,

Yeah, covid is still a thing... Well, I had almost forgotten about it until I got here at UCSC for the Summer Session, and people had to start...

Fo onggi tsest ievpiost hemo eaeubsc. S'htan a neispgka atth bnee it atth lpans ewhli thi o'yure cldcaeenl fo rt!teeb w,on cuseeab a utb of ym ewf vhae fo s'it ofr ni os em very hwile radde.
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Scdlairltya ouyr ricecl rdnfei eancgdh sah. Essug rof uto tseho" ,uyo ntvh'ea i ,elwl hgnu niesc i !own isgl"r htiw voer ryea. Psfiidnrhe or g,headcn ltessco rnfdtifee fo ntperta vaeh fo 5 sesl i i ro thta os tspropu eomr hatt, eplpeo sha jsut tath ensocrid ahtt eirfdns mfro uoy ssmeyt the my ouprg lyseatiseln wlaasy tdsneai ym eopepl etsb adh wats'n as,eplc) a(ll. . . The uysb on i tsaet!s btu rfo lsrmlae het arleyl eonsagri to ea,rmyon and ndt'o etlf obrfee eeendkws oes,clyuenqtn psratei aws stlli i ,cone i i nlps,a big og rfo.
I ewhol i isms eric,itvo thta adn o,iefs hsote udnrnke grwe i ttha fo ahtt ruop,g odnt' pogru guess eengisvn i an'tc ubt wthi jtsu tou asy. Lilst urn,dk nidf ym me i awys teg eevileb i. Leittl i ewre abhtsi iolhc,solac htta i renedncsgroii 'mi edis ym otu no eusgs fuodn dan dsda' aut,lylca my ym nad rdoeiwr l,lew denagrfahtr nad naut onw a.
Oepple usyg ufn erttpy are are ehetr fnu vene ni theer btu, reit!zwdasnl. . . A salsc ,ellw hatn olflciiafy i rekba ulasylac h,aey d!oebnryfi how a ayraujn iecns tnidga sels ni ceins for nebe houht?g!!t ewd' igong evha ubt 'veew oynl dwe'luov nbee mont,h and tnrlfgii mlao otu srnipg. I fscselucus i on lfei oigg,n i)elf my i swa tuohght veol aws asw i tetingg ihst ksdea who ,oswdr thiw cdexeit batuo i eolv deiwrro tlisl ym ni( rltete neo esugs you to herot sidrphfeisn asw lxfe the utb ym rhwee.
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I hte ranmoye ,saaywyn t'dno aeth iwsss. Hatt lvneaig, evi' of eebcmo ndki thdatcea elppoe auta,llcy 'mi of so to eoms own dwerori. Emth uttihow sole adn of ot ,esit nd'ot sethe eilf m'i i cadsre natw. I( t,bu adn ggion tonw' eslo tyhree' feli lpopee etem egssu i nto to ,neam dan nwe e)di, l'li i on seog hmte. Jstu is't. . . Uhrt brbaoply s'ti agnon.
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The wtne salrtpai stfir. . . Oodg i sujt eul,ssrt oodg as hhgtuot etyh rwee ont ,lewl sa. Hitw i sa good nad a was 3, i a sa 4 oytrhis tno ghotuht twih mcsiu ieladf. Ecdepxet mdmbue otu n(da thta stlli sa bgine ersoc aws i nda ym ihhg os not as i rvlleoa ,5 outab a)m aotub. . . As sa nad tsannah' tno high. . . I'm ti gttenig rove but. .
Ap,astlri i elltti necsi eht a hte in rosla whta nauxsoi mi' ,ralgeen dnsceo rchfne cleyipaesl ttsa'h dna orf egttgin iadelf. . . . Ondt' fine em ubt rcidet ofr speke to gvei be tath hatt smlfey dan gletiln so shti i ouhegn sffut 'mi gniog yovneree. . . Tsju ti that neitar ti usjt yo,u and keep beucase agimazn im' em atspe oelv ,korgwin let tequo onang mrof i.
Ot csoheo wokn not, to ,tineslsryobpii fi i eavh eli,f st'i is if iirtnaelbg ingvha abyitil oury it styhit of nrctolo ehosco kssuc y"ou oyu but itsh ndik nda s'it eht. ".
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Ta'ths salo 'mi i my usegs niu ocaitipnsapl pragahncpoi who. Eb railtgh so oshsocl liygppan utogh tath ot i yman ton im' yanaswy hdsoul. Eb ni tlihrga was hnew a but ogt tol nhnaat i yfaurb,re i or cesotnej,ri rceiievgn a tleitl i of oludsh ikhtn delrrfaes rdwoeri. Iievmettocp iangim as my edifl m'i otn hhgi dan be 'dsnouhlt sa.
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Tast'h lewl i sgesu it. Etruuf a 'mi treiw ,won ot 0232 of oanng ettler go me. Ryve woiredr rhe 'im fro.
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Oedbyg,o.
Iam.

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