A letter from Aug 6th, 2021

Dear FutureMe, hey it’s you but from the past, hello. i’m struggling right now, and i feel like you might be too. i’m sure if y’all broke up or not but i hope to god you guys haven’t, he’s too amazing to let go of. but if you did, move on, as hard as that might be. everyone in class right now is joking around about it while i’m here writing something serious. idk. but anyways, atm i’m having horrible anxiety, i have the worst nausea and stomach ache and my heart feels like it’s racing and i can’t keep my myself from fidgeting. i might take a whole little bottle of advil i have in my bag and i hope ipads out only temporarily, just to scare some people and see who actually cares. i feel alone and i feel like pushing everyone away and just becoming a lone wolf even tho zac says i shouldn’t. idk what to do. mom isn’t paying attention to how seriously bad my mental health is right now. i’m so close to just giving up and ending it all. oh god. i’m so close to a break down. i feel like crying. my god.