A letter from Jul 16th, 2021

Dear FutureMe, have no idea when we finish uni but here we go: hello! it’s 18 year old you. surviving the days and the months. i cant believe we finished uni.. what was it like? was it just like we imagined? is the future bright for us? did we make loads of friends and meet loads of people? i haven’t started yet, i’m actually in the bath while i write this. you know how we can’t get … nerves and such. it’s nerve wracking i don’t know why but to think that i’m going to be packing to get ready for uni and start a whole new chapter of my life.. sounds insane. it FEELS insane. i really hope we enjoyed it. i hope we didn’t loose ourselves, i hope we stayed the bubbly lovely and moral girl we’ve always been. i hope we’re happy. that’s all we’ve ever really wanted to be honest. to be happy and healthy and do everything we dreamed about. talking about dreams, how is acting! how is it going! any exciting offers? do we have an agent! is acting still what we want to do? i won’t get mad if you say no- i’ll be slightly disappointed but i won’t be mad, i’m always really harsh to myself sometimes i forget i’m young and i’m allowed to make mistakes and think something will last forever even though it most likely won’t. tomorrow i’m going to pride in the park, pride in the park is a tiktok event hosted by a bunch of queer people as pride this year was cancelled because of covid ( how is the covid situation? gone completely i hope! nah kidding i have a sinking suspicion that it got worse. ) anyway i’m excited i need more friends and more people to be around me who are queer. essex uni is screaming my name but that doesn’t stop me from missing the fact i’m not staying in london :( what’s the queer scene in essex like? are you having fun? are you happy! are you in a relationship? sorry i’m asking so many questions i just know how much we wanted this! i know we made the right decision i know we did the right thing! talking about decisions! we’re already overthinking about the year abroad! sweden or korea? iceland or norway’ what one did you pick! i know whatever choice you made id be happy but i cant wait to hear ALL about it! there’s so much i could say to you, so much i want to say. i want to say that i think you’re brave and smart and funny. i think you’re beautiful, i think you should always be proud of yourself no matter what. i think a lot of bad stuff has happened to you but you really prevailed and for that i’m so happy you exist. we are going to do everything we want to do in life. if the dream you created when you were nine and in lovr with cameron boyce to become one of the greatest actors was too much then all we say is “not in this lifetime.” if we’re doing something else as long as we’re happy and we enjoy it then i’m happy. congratulations on finishing university my love <3 cheers to the next big chapter ( and cheers to me for almost starting ! )