A letter from Jun 22nd, 2021

My dear girl, How have you been? I've been meaning to write for some days but was postponing it. Hm. Idk where to start. It's very hot today. We might go shopping but idk. Mummy wants to buy some mugs. You broke all of them, remember. You broke your round frames too, dropped it while trying to balance everything. Broke it the way you break yourself into tiny particles under the pressure of this horrid horrid world *dramatic sniff* lmao. No but really, wasn't that supposed to be shatter proof? Hm. We've been breaking a lot of things ever since we came to this house. I am telling you, there's somebody here who just wants me to break everything. And relishes in that. For God's sake, I broke the laptop too. I mean, it's not that bad but stillll. If I were in Japan, I'd have said it was a zashiki warashi. It probably is a zashiki warashi. *sigh* Anyway, it's hoooot today. I just hung up the clothes on the drying line. Lol. Taar sounds better. dRyiNG LiNe. Anyway it's hoooooot. That being said, I wasn't able to sleep yesterday. I'm having trouble with my sleep. I can only sleep in the morning terrible. Also, Porcupine the stray is preggie. I can't wait to name her kids cutlet and pork chop. Will need to think of more names. I'm sure she'll give birth to more than 2. Alsoooo, she has accepted us. Muhahahahaha. I mean it did take a whole year but effort payssss! She still swipes at me, but at least she likes to sleep beside me. Huhu. Nobody can escape my charm. Huhu huhu. Except our ex crush. Ummm. That being said, I've so much to tell youuuu. I'm so proud of you for donating our hair. That's like the only thing I can brag about in life. Heh. How sad. I am praying you are happy and have achieved what I have been trying to achieve for so long. I can only pray for you. My darling. If you haven't, don't lose hope. As papa says, you must give tension to people, not let them give you tension. To be fair, this is not something I'd like us to inculcate in us, but :) I know you. You'd probably get off on annoying others lmao. Do you still get angry like a madwoman? Try controlling yourself my sweet. We must not prove people right. (*please insert a creepy and scary person rubbing their palms together. Gif*) Our birthday was amazing. You looked so sescy with that hair. I fell in love. But. Man. It's so hard to maintain short hair. >< and here I was thinking it'd require no effort oooof. Do you haaaaaveee more piercings? Say yes. Say yes. If no, imagine me slapping you. Girl. What are yoooo doinnnn!!! I made up with R and V. But you already know that. I wonder whether we talk not. I am avoiding N because god f. We finally know why a whole group decided to ignore us in second year. You are so unlucky with people. But Idk baybee, I wasn't really surprised. Maybe because somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew she was like that. It's funny, she'd say, "don't trust people who complain about others to you. They will complain about you as well." And she ackchewally did that. Lmao. I hope you don't gossip or talk **** about people? I don't do it, and I'd expect the same from you. Don't be like her. That reminded me, the people in the group are trying to be friendly suddenly after ignoring me. I wonder why. H, L to be precise. I also tod Z and S sorry for "bullying" Them. N claims I did, but we know I didn't. How pathetic when she was the one who went out of her way to spew ****. But then, I was complicit. I never spoke against her. And that makes me a 100 times more problematic. I only hope when I did, I'm forgiven for hurting all the people I've hurt without realising. As for the other case, yk if we hurt people knowingly, it's because we have been treated unjustly. What elseeeeee~~~~ I still don't have a boyfriend hehe Oh.... Girlie. I started a new ig account. I hope I get famous. I'll be so happy. :3 yea yea. My priorities lmao. But really, I just hope I get popular so that I can actually help people the way I intend to. Although I bet, nobody needs my help. Hm. But I would still like to help. Also, congratulations!!!!! You are done with MA wooohooooooo. And lovely dissertation. I'm proud of myself. Hehe. I just hope you score well (: can't trust our ex supervisor. Also, I don't think you've forgotten, but dadima passed away. You know that right. Can't remember the date though. I'm an *******. Um. Idk how to react. I'm upset despite myself. Yk how badly she treated us, ignored us when we were abused but I still feel upset. I probably think this way to make myself feel better about actively avoiding her. But can you blame me. Alternatively, can you blame her heh. So problematic. I bet if I told N this, she'd have said, "chutiya ho _name_" Hm. But I wouldn't have told N. Precisely because she'd have scoffed at me. Covid has been a terrible experience. Nan's father passed away. She was abroad. Had gone back a couple of days before. And BR, that sweet girl, her parents passed away. Our grandma passed away. Nee-auntie's husband passed away. D-uncle passed away. I feel like, every direction I turn to, somebody would be missing from there. I have yet to talk to C-di. I should talk to her, right? I am not brave enough though. Because I don't wanna end up on a sad note.... I made coffee lemonade yesterday. I forgot the name, but it's that Portuguese drink. Also, Vietnamese coffee. Such delicious drinks. I'll probably make rose milk tea in a few days. Mummy is so lovely. Her face is sagging. Cheeks and eyes. I don't wanna look old, I always wish to have a taut skin. I hope I don't look ugly when I grow old. I think I'll stop. I haven't slept last night and I'm yawning like craaazy. Bye my sweet, I hope you continue to feel good and have an amazing day. *kisses and hugs* -Younger Self 22/6/2021 6:18 am (hehhhh told you. I'm not the one to wake up early, though I need to change my time table)