A letter from Jun 16th, 2021

Dear FutureMe, it’s 2:15am on thursday the 17th of june 2021. you turned 25 this year. around this time a year ago, you left LA, along with so the friends you love & half of your things because of covid 19 which kind of ruined the world and a lot of your plans for the future. somewhere along the way you managed to pick up depression & anxiety and are currently on 20mg of paxil. most of the time the days blend into each other. most nights you go to sleep hoping you don’t wake up and when you wake up it often feels near impossible to get out of bed. you’ve thought about ending things a lot but don’t plan on following through. all your friends around you are in happy relationships and/or married and you’re a little lonely, but you say it doesn’t bother you too much, and that love will find you when it wants. you’re in a mildly successful band who’s been signed to major labels, toured australia, america, and around asia, and your band’s music has hundreds of millions of streams - one of your songs went gold independently, by the way - but you feel like you personally don’t deserve any of it. you’re sure music is what you were born to do but you don’t find as much enjoyment in it as you used to. you don’t find enjoyment in many things actually. you’ve been playing video games to pass the time & it takes your mind off things for the most part, but sometimes even that feels like too much. you’ve been going to a psychologist for all of this though, and they’ve been very helpful so far. you owe them a lot. you’ve also been going to the gym pretty consistently & so have lost around 20kgs since your heaviest, which you’re very proud of yourself for. you should be proud of yourself more, by the way. you’ve come a long way. imagine if high school, set-for-med-school joey knew all the cool things you’d achieve, he’d be so proud of you. you’re 30 now. i have no idea where you could be reading this from. i’m sure it’s somewhere cool :) also, MGK. joey